Blink
by XxFern-Rydel-RosexX
Summary: It was horrible, you have no idea how horrible it was for me to be there or how terrified I was. But if she hadn't have been reaped; I wouldn't have met him, I wouldn't have fallen so deeply, unknowingly, hopelessly, in love with him. But there was one thing in our way... I volunteered for the Hunger Games. FinnickxOC
1. Prologue

In the blink of an eye, everything can change. The people around you, where you live, the amount you know about something. Sometimes it's for the better, sometimes it's for the worse. When it happened to me it was definitely for the worse. What could be good about being thrown into an arena to try and kill twenty three other kids?

They say things happen for a reason. The people that go in, go in for a reason; the people that don't, don't go in for a reason; the people that win, win for a reason. Maybe he was my reason. Because if she hadn't have been reaped, I wouldn't have met him, I wouldn't have fallen so deeply, unknowingly, hopelessly, in love with him. But there was just one problem.

This was the 70th Annual Hunger Games... And I probably wasn't going to make it out alive.


	2. Chapter 1

It was warm in District Four, the sea making the breeze smell slightly salty and my brown hair frizzy at the top. Mum had fixed it so two pieces that would have framed my face sat in a bow at the back of my head and the rest fell down past my shoulders. My dress was navy, with a grey collar and sleeves and I wore matching slip on shoes - the same outfit I had worn on this day since my other one got too small when I was fifteen. I was a couple hours early for the reaping, but I couldn't stand to be at home while my mother cried as my sister and brother got dressed too. Senna and Kai were 13, I was eighteen. The five year age gap made all the difference - but of course I loved them.

I was snapped out of my daze by a loud shout from behind me, making me almost fall off of the rock I was sitting on. Turning, I saw two figures frantically waving their arms at each other and squinted to see who it was. _Annie Cresta_, I thought as I glanced over the head of red hair that coordinated with her familiar forest green reaping dress. She was with her boyfriend, Finnick Odair, Victor of the 65th Hunger Games and one of the most misunderstood people ever - well in my eyes anyway. He's not that arrogant if you just talk to him without congratulating him or mentioning the games at all really; not that I'd even talked to him, I got that from Annie herself. She was lovely too, if not a little overpowering at times, but the two of them seemed good for each other, Finnick needed someone after the games, since he was so young it must have affected him a lot. But they were fighting - which was pretty obvious to begin with but that's what made it so odd - they never fought. I stayed put, not wanting either of them to notice me and luckily they disappeared a few seconds later. Sighing, I looked up at the large clock by the Justice Building and seeing I still had a while to go, decided to take a walk on the beach to clear my head.

I closed my eyes as the moisture from the waves hit my face, letting it sink in, so I would remember in case I never came back. The beach was generally out of bounds unless you were a worker or it was a weekend and peacekeepers were lining the bays, but no one really cared on reaping day – people would die because of it anyway. I gasped as my foot hit something hard and looked down, noticing something metal buried under the sand. I slowly bent down to pick it up, marvelling once I realised what it was. A bronze trident. Only the rich people had them - not that anyone in Four was ridiculously poor, but there were some that didn't eat a couple nights a week – I weighed it between my hands and turned to check if there was anyone around. Seeing no one, I adopted the stance my Father had taught me and let the weapon fly. Wincing as it made a clanging noise as it collided with the edge of the dock, I smiled slightly – I hadn't thrown a trident in years.

XX

I stood in line patiently, my hands quivering somewhat, ready to get signed in and take my place with the rest of the eighteen year olds. Once the sobbing twelve year old in front of me moved out the way, I stepped forward, holding out my hand and hissing at the prick on my finger. Once my fingerprint was down, I made my way through the crowds of people and to my small group of friends – which included Annie. I didn't want to think about how many times their names were in there, let alone how many mine was. I'm pretty sure it was something like fourty-two because of the tesserae I had taken.

I didn't take long before Iunia – the District Four escort – to trot onto stage and start giving a stupid speech that no one believes a word of, before giving the cue for the video to play. It was the same every year. _'War, terrible war'_ was really the only part I got to before zoning out and raking my eyes over the scene before me. Iunia was mouthing the words, the Mayor was sitting straight, his face passive and the line of previous victors all had their eyes closed, like a silent agreement between them – or maybe it was too painful to watch.

When the video finished, the tension in the air grew even more and all that was heard was the clicking of Iunia's heels as she went over to the reaping ball. I always hated the saying _'ladies first'_ because it applied here too. I stared intently as her hand swam in the pool of names, until in less than a second she ripped one from the waves and held it as she returned to the microphone.

"Annie Cresta."

My breath hitched as my friends pushed me back, letting Annie walk past and into the aisle between the boys and girls. I saw my sister sobbing into the girl next to her's shoulder, Annie was more of a sister to her than I was. I moved my gaze to Finnick, he sat leaning forward, eyes wide and scared. I looked back to Senna and then to Annie herself. She was almost on the stage – where was the volunteer? We always had a back-up, in case someone unfit was reaped, but I guess they didn't think Annie was unfit. I didn't know what I was doing when I did it, when I stepped out of the crowd and stood my ground with peacekeepers walking towards me.

"I volunteer as tribute." I didn't know why I said it, what made me risk my life for her, I didn't know at the time.

I saw the peacekeeper's grip loosen on Annie and felt it tighten on me as they pushed my forwards. We crossed in the middle and locked eyes, mine scarce of any emotion, hers full of tears and sadness. I was shoved up the steps to the stage and gestured to move forward by Iunia, who then grabbed my arm and began speaking into the microphone again.

"What's your name?"

"Mari Gallagher." My voice was hoarse and I stayed still, my eyes fixed on the crowd in front of me, they looked so much more broken from the front.

The perfectly manicured hand then swam in the other ball, this time the names of all the boys between twelve and eighteen in the District at risk of being plucked out. Finally, after what seemed like hours of watching the paper swirl round like a tornado, one piece was lifted out and the clicking of heels was once again the only sound you could hear.

"Coy Mallory." I knew him. He was in my brother's class, he'd visited for tea the week before. He was only thirteen.

Where were the volunteers? The people who were trained to fight, to save the younger ones from having to go into the arena? This never happened, there was always someone ready to step up instead of those who actually got reaped.

And before I knew it, it was over. Coy and I were taken into two separate rooms in the Justice Building and I sat in the corner, waiting for someone to come in. After a few minutes, the door creaked open and three people walked in. My siblings ran to me and I enveloped them in my arms, running my hands through their hair. They sobbed into my shoulder and I tried my best to comfort them as I looked up, a confused look appearing on my face. The woman who walked in wasn't my Mother, it was Annie. I sent her a questioning look and got an _'I'm sorry'_ mouthed to me in return. My own Mother didn't come to say goodbye to me before I went off to get killed.

Senna and Kai babbled to me, telling me to try and win and that they would miss me. I replied with the same, telling them I loved them and to look after Mum, but not getting out tesserae, it wasn't worth putting their names in more times but reminding them to collect mine after they left. Annie then stepped forward, enveloping me in a hug.

"Thank you. I'll look after them." She whispered in my ear and I hugged her tighter.

"Thank you." I muttered back, blinking as to not let myself cry, breathing in, I pulled back and turned to my brother and sister again, "Now, Annie's gonna take care of you, be good, I love you."

I was sure that was the last time I was going to see my family and my Mum didn't even show up. A few more minutes went by before the peacekeepers took me out the room again and down the corridor. This was it, my last moments in District Four.

XX

The train was absolutely stunning. I looked around in envy as I realised that this was what the Capitol had, that they didn't share with the Districts. It was silent after Iunia gave us the tour, no one dared say anything, start planning strategies, nothing. Because it was obvious, it was obvious neither Coy nor I were going to make it out of that arena alive. I didn't change my clothes, even though it was made known that anything in our rooms we could wear or use, it just felt wrong. All the clothes were form the Capitol, with large collars or frills and lace – I wasn't a frills and lace kind of girl. The silence just kept getting even more awkward, Finnick constantly sending me looks and Coy silently crying into his hands, it was all too much.

My head was spinning and my heart was pounding and my lungs felt like they were shrinking. I couldn't control my breathing and tears began to blur my vision. I couldn't believe that this was happening to me. I dropped the cutlery I held in my hand, placing my hands over my head and trying to block out all the sounds I could hear, sounds that I don't think were actually coming from anyone on the train, but sounds from the train – from outside the train. A hand touched my shoulder but I flinched away, not wanting anyone near me. But soon after another hand touched my shoulder, but this one felt different, this one felt like the person genuinely cared whether I was okay. Stupid, I know, but it did. I let the person pull me into their arms and relaxed into them, sobbing my heart out into their shirt.

Soon, the noise stopped and I could think clearly again, my sobs turning into slight sniffs and I could breathe again. I moved my head upwards, almost gasping at who I saw. Finnick had been comforting me?

"I'm sorry." I rasped, immediately wincing at how my voice sounded.

"It's fine, now are you okay? We've arrived."

This was it. I was in the Capitol and I probably wasn't ever going home.


	3. Chapter 2

Finnick and I had quickly followed Coy and the others off the train and I knew that everyone could see how much I had cried, both from my face and the large tear stain on Finnick's shirt. I didn't understand it, why were these Capitol people so happy to see children get murdered every year? They had smiles on their faces and were cheering at us as we walked past, trying to catch a glimpse of anything and everything they could – it was sick. He stayed near me, making sure I didn't have another meltdown probably, his hand sometimes on the small of my back, guiding me through the halls of the train station and to the car.

I spent a majority of the journey staring out the window, gazing at the buildings and the people of the Capitol. If you said it wasn't beautiful you were obviously lying, obviously so envious that you had to be derogative towards it. I was jealous, yes, angry even, that they had all of this and the Districts had nothing, but I couldn't deny how stunning the architecture of the city was. The people however, well the people were odd to say the least – to be honest odd was far from what could be said about the men and women that roamed the streets. Some of them just wore wigs, had a few tattoos, but many had these and had then taken a leap to dying their skin, wearing things that made them look like balloons and changing their facial features to that of an animal's. Maybe that was why we were so interesting to them, we were plain and to them, plain was different. I fiddled with my dull brown hair as we sped past a woman with a large blue – what I can only describe as a cloud on the top of her head. I turned back around, to see if Coy was looking like I had, only for the car to turn a corner and I fell into the lap of the man next to me. I felt my face heat up as I sat up again, not having the strength to look in his direction again, only catching a small smirk on his lips in my peripheral vision – which only made me get even warmer.

I managed to avoid Finnick's gaze for the rest of the car ride, only catching his eye briefly as I got out and then again when they showed me to my prep team. I had gulped when I saw what the people who were supposed to make me look amazing looked like themselves. The first introduced herself as Albidella; she had lightly tanned skin that looked like it had been painted over to have a light shine to it; a metal cap over her head, so tight that I wondered if there was any hair underneath at all; but what worried me most was the fact she had no natural eyebrows, instead hers were made of two shaped pieces of what looked scarily like foil. The second was a man, with much less done to himself, his pale skin was almost untouched, the only thing on it being a light blue line of eyeliner and lipliner; matching the shade of his curly head of hair; he kissed both my cheeks and introduced himself as Paisley. Lastly, there was Caldesia, who was nothing like the others. Her skin was tinted a shiny pink and orange in certain places, with her lips being heavily painted those colours as well. Her eyes were outlined with a deep blue and her eyebrows made of a line of turquoise and a line of orange and her hair was short a the back, but spiked up a good few inches in a vibrant pink and orange pattern. I was honestly scared to be left alone in a room with them.

It seemed though, that I needn't have worried about it as the only harm the three did, was rip out pretty much all the hair on my body. I sat patiently as they waxed and scrubbed and moisturised me, answering their occasional questions simply, but otherwise listening to the gossip that poured out of their primped mouths. They had me sitting in a chair as Albidella and Paisley pasted this goo onto my hair and Caldesia was doing allsorts to my face when they changed their subject to something that interested me.

"Apparently Finnick Odair refused the other day." Cladesia whispered not-so-quietly and I sat up slightly, wanting to know what this was about.

"Refused?" Paisley questioned, letting the room go silent for a few seconds before continuing, "I wonder what Snow did…"

"Not sure, but he wouldn't have been happy, must have made something happen to him at home." The pink-haired woman replied, grabbing a small metal device and coming towards my eyebrows with it.

I wanted to know what Finnick refused to do. Sure I'd heard that Victors sometimes had to do things for Snow, but I didn't know that he would do something to them if they refused.

"But, why would he refuse, he loves the attention."

Albidella's comment made me realise. Finnick got tonnes of attention from the women of the Capitol, which was obvious – sometimes even the men seemed to have a thing for him. And what could Snow get out of that? Snow could get a whore out of Finnick and it probably wasn't just him either. I felt my heart drop at my own thoughts; Finnick slept around because Snow told him too… And he'd refused. But nothing had happened to him as a punishment, his family were all okay – not that he really had any anyway - as far as I was concerned and so was – Annie. Annie got reaped. And I volunteered. I got in the way of Snow's plan to punish Finnick for refusing to do something which meant he probably wanted to punish me too… I got us both into more trouble than we were already in.

"Huh?" I jumped as a hand waved in front of my face, quickly realising that the prep team was staring at me, "Sorry." I blushed, hanging my head.

"It's fine, we were just asking what you thought of Finnick?" Albidella asked me and the three continued to take me down to _'beauty-base zero'._

"He's nice," I replied, "I've never really spoken to him though… I kinda just cried into his shirt and said sorry." I chuckled, finally understanding how stupid I must have been.

"Today? What happened?" I was shocked by the sincerity of Paisley's voice, like he actually cared.

I waited a few seconds before taking a breath and answering him, "I had a bit of a freak out on the train, I'm good now though."

"Well good, because the sponsors we are going to get you aren't going to want you crying."

I smiled lightly at the words, they actually wanted to get me sponsors? They wanted to help me win? I thought they just did it because they wanted to say they were involved in the mighty Hunger Games, to say they'd been able to be near the elusive tributes that year offered… But they seemed to genuinely care.

XX

"Hello, my name is Solveig, I'll be your stylist."

Now this was a person I could work with. Solveig was so beautiful and pretty much all natural, even her clothing was mainly simple. Her hair was long and curly, strawberry blonde in colour and her skin was a light tan. The only thing that seemed artificial was the vibrant violet colour of her eyes, which were beautiful and sparkled in the light – overall she seemed welcoming.

"Hi, I'm Mari." I took her outstretched hand and smiled lightly, taking the robe she handed to me as my prep team had left me in absolutely nothing.

"Now, Mari," We sat opposite each other and Solveig crossed her legs over as she looked into my eyes, "I'm going to try and make this experience a bit easier for you. I'm going to do all I can to make you look even more stunning than you already are to get you those sponsors."

My face heated up for probably the hundredth time that day as she called me stunning and I hung my head, letting my hair fall in front of my face, "Thank you." I muttered.

"And don't worry, I'm not going to make you look stupid – I'm going to make you look like a goddess."

Soon enough, the prep team were brought back in and Solveig brought out my outfit in a black bag, so I couldn't see it. She had told me that before Panem, people had worshipped many gods and goddesses and there were many different ones for different things and there were even water goddesses – so she based my chariot costume on that. Albidella and Paisley set to work on my hair again and Caldesia grabbed a load of makeup and began applying it to my face – all with the supervision of my stylist. Once they were done, I wasn't allowed to look in the mirror or at the dress, meaning I had to close my eyes and let them dress me. I blindly stepped into a pair of heels before I felt a soft fabric being placed over my head. I breathed in as the buttons were done up, not really enjoying the feeling of the material around my neck. I took a deep breath when I was told I could look, opening my eyes in one fluid motion. I was taken aback by what I saw staring back at me in the mirror. My hair was braided and then pulled into an updo with a headpiece of gold and silver old coins and my makeup had smoky eyes and deep navy blue lips. But the dress, oh the dress was absolutely beautiful. It was a faded blue colour, with sandy brown underlays and it flowed down to the floor with a slight train. The bodice had a clear structure over the top, which had golden lines that went around and accentuated my waist and my chest area and came out on the shoulders and the waist in small dome like shapes. I span around to look at them all and their grinning faces – they'd made me look pretty.

"This is amazing."

XX

After the team had made sure everything was perfect, they escorted me down to the – well it was kind of a stable as they kept the horses there, I didn't know exactly what it was. We made our way over to everyone else from Four, the other mentor and Finnick all talking to Coy. Mags was the other mentor, but she didn't really talk much and if she did, it wasn't very audibly, I thought it was from a stroke she might have had – she was in at least her late seventies after all. Her and Finnick were close though, I'd noticed that when I had seen them together at reapings and on the train to the Capitol earlier on. Coy wore a male version of my dress, the colour the same and the golden domes on his toga style costume, with a coin crown too plus sandals instead of heels. He looked so small though, smaller than he actually was; as he was tall for his age but I knew him, he was my brother's friend and I'd practically seen him grow over the past couple of years. We joined them quickly, ignoring looks from the other tributes and everyone complimented me and congratulated Solveig on the idea. I thanked them all before going to stand by Mags, smiling at her as she patted me on the arm. She shook her head at me and pointed to the left. I followed her gaze and found myself locking eyes with Finnick, who had been staring at me, before I blushed and turned back around. The old woman gestured for me to lean down and I did so as she opened her mouth.

"Think's you're beautiful." Her voice croaked and I chuckled, shaking my head.

"I'm sure he doesn't." Making a face at me, Mags gave me another pat on the arm before stalking over to Finnick and they began kind of talking, but it was more him than Mags.

I stood alone for a few minutes, watching the horses get attached to the front of the chariots and giving the other tributes a once over. We'd watched the reapings on the train and I saw just how intimidating the tributes from One and Two were on the screen, let alone in real life. I knew they could all easily kill me, just by watching the looks on their faces and how they acted towards other people. I looked at the tributes from Twelve, the girl standing out to me. They were dressed as coal miners as Twelve usually was, but she was around my age and her eyes sparkled in the light, the blue reminding me of the sea back home – she looked strong. I was brought out my stupor by a hand on my shoulder and I jumped, whipping around to see Finnick standing behind me with a sheepish smile on his face, holding out his hand.

"Sugarcube?" He offered and I shook my head, only noticing then how sick I felt, "You look amazing by the way, Solveig did a great job – not, not that you weren't pretty before."

I felt a blush rise once more as he spoke, it was really starting to annoy me how easy it was for people to make me embarrassed or flattered, it had never happened before.

"Thank you."

I looked up at him and my mind immediately flashed back to the conversation Albidella, Paisley and Caldesia had while they were getting me ready. I felt horrible for him. Everyone thought he was this arrogant man but in reality that was just a mask he put on to hide how much he had been put through, he survived the Hunger Games but was then thrown into a completely different set of games, one that threatened more than just his life, but the lives of those he loved. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't will myself to and I looked back at him as Coy and I were helped up onto our chariot a few minutes later, ready to put my own mask on.


	4. Chapter 3

I squinted as the setting sun hit my eyes, quickly adjusting to the difference in lighting and taking everything in. Thousands of Capitol citizens were screaming and cheering, waving roses and their hands and I was a bit overwhelmed by it all. I remembered what everyone did this for though, to get us sponsors – they'd made me look amazing, now it was my turn. I looked down at Coy, seeing his petrified face and bent down - ignoring the reaction from the crowd – placing and hand on his shoulder.

"Let's give them something to cheer for, eh?" I smiled at him and he but his lip before nodding, a smile soon gracing his face too.

I grabbed his hand and faced out to the crowd, smiling and waving, making sure he did the same and feeling myself relax as they all cheered for us, throwing flowers and I could even hear our names being called by a few people – is that what getting sponsors took? Making the Capitol people think you loved them, that you were angels? No, otherwise everyone would get sponsors, there was more to it, I just needed to find out what. I didn't let go of Coy's hand as the chariot jolted to a stop, my face returned to a blank screen and I looked up to where President Snow was standing, trying to calm the crowds.

"Welcome, welcome," He bellowed, finally getting the silence he needed and paused, looking over us all, "Tributes, we welcome you. We salute your courage… and your sacrifice." It was probably just me, but I could hear the malice in his voice as he said that, he didn't care, "And we wish you, happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favour."

May the odds be ever in our favour my ass. These people got entertainment out of children killing each other, that wasn't wishing the odds to be good to us, that was choosing who got the odds. They were the people who bet on us, the people who chose who they wanted to win and as far as they were concerned the others could rot. It wasn't humane. Nothing about the way the Capitol treated the Districts was humane.

The chariot rolled off again and I kept a firm grip on the boy next to me's hand until we got back to the others. After we stepped off, I pulled him into a hug and told him that it was good, that it would have helped us get sponsors. He was like Kai, which was probably why they were friends… he even looked like him. Their blond hair and green eyes were almost the same, except Coy's eyes were slightly darker and more almond shaped. Everyone surrounded us with praise, Mags telling me that what I did would help a lot; Finnick seconding the statement before leading us to the lift. It was small, small enough so only our teams fit in and we didn't have to face the other tributes or their mentors - which would have just been awkward. It didn't take long for the doors to open and for my breath to be completely taken away by how astonishing the apartment was. Everything was so bright and colourful and the view was absolutely amazing, it still made me that bit angrier at the Capitol – well President Snow.

The first thing Iunia did was give us a tour and I marvelled at how big my room was. It was the size of my front room at home in Four and they had the wardrobe stocked with tonnes of clothes ready to wear – some of them were actually nice as well, instead of the normal Capitol wear. When Iunia and Coy left to go to his room, I changed into a pair of dark blue and green checked shorts and a striped baggy shirt, not wanting to be in anything restricting or uncomfortable and those were the least eye-catching clothes I could find. I let my hair down and ran a brush though it before retying it into a messy bun on the top of my head and rummaging around for something to take off the thick layer of gunk on my face. I left the room a few minutes later, making my way back to the open area where everyone was sitting at the dining table and I felt myself blush again as I was the last to arrive. The dinner was amazing, I suddenly felt the urge to swallow as much as I could while I had the chance, but new I'd look like an idiot – so I took a little, knowing I could go back for seconds if I wanted.

In the midst of everyone talking about how well the night went, an avox walked over to the table and handed Finnick a letter; which as he read, the smile dropped from his face and he gulped and I had a pretty good feeling I knew what was in that letter after my realisation in the prep room. No one else had batted an eyelid, they were all too engrossed in the conversation to notice the mentor's mood had suddenly changed and his whole mask had fallen, you could see how vulnerable he was, how broken the Capitol had made him.

XX

A few hours later I was wandering through the halls of the apartment, on my way to get a glass of water before I went to bed like I was told to, when I heard a noise from near the lift. I poked my head around the corner, my heart unexpectantly clenching as I saw Finnick pulling on a jacket, the letter in between his teeth as he struggled with the sleeves. I stepped out from behind the wall to go and speak to him, unknowing that there was a slight dip in the floor so I tripped and fell into the wall, hitting my elbow and hissing in pain; consequently making him turn around. And I blushed again.

"Hi." I stated, sheepishly smiling at him and rubbing my elbow.

"What are you doing here?" I raised an eyebrow and the bronze haired boy sighed, trying to fight the smile threatening to take over his serious expression, "You know what I mean."

"I was going to get some water before I went to sleep." I stated, now feeling the awkward tension between us as he eyed the lift and then turned back to me.

"Well you should hurry up then."

I was taken aback by his hostile tone and from the look on his face so was he. I nodded, continuing in the direction of the kitchen but stopped as I got there and I heard the door to the lift open and clenched my fists.

"I know where you're going." I exclaimed, spinning around to face him again, catching the surprised look before it turned to one of horror.

"How did you-"

"My prep team were talking about it earlier. About how you refused the other day, that's why Annie got reaped, isn't it?"

I was breathing heavily, needing an answer. His eyes were locked on mine and I could feel myself getting lost in the blue-green pool of colour, feeling myself become upset and worried as I saw the same emotions swimming in them. I knew he had to leave, that being late would only make it worse, so I broke the gaze and turned my back to him.

"Just go."

XX

It was about midnight when I was heard the lift come up and open on our floor. I had trouble falling asleep and spent the late hours of the night sitting by the window overlooking the Capitol, thinking everything over. How was everyone at home? Did they see me at the Tribute Parade? Had Mum been okay? Was Annie looking after the kids alright? Where was Finnick? Who was it that he was with and why was he taking so long? Did volunteering put him in more danger? My eyes raked over him as he stepped into the apartment, taking off his jacket and throwing it to the side, running a hand through his messy hair. He looked tired, slightly sweaty but overall he looked absolutely miserable. He began to peel off his shirt and I coughed lightly to notify him of my presence. Immediately he stopped stripping and turned to face me, a light smirk playing on his mouth.

"Wait up for me, did you?" He teased and I rolled my eyes, even though he was acting most of the time, Finnick was still a pretty cocky guy when he wanted to be.

"You wish," I retorted, a smile on my lips before I quickly sobered up, "I couldn't sleep."

I stayed silent as he moves towards where I sat, taking off his shoes on the way and settling down on the opposite side of the windowsill to me. We stayed in that silence for a while and for the first time it wasn't awkward when we weren't talking to each other, it felt almost… comfortable.

"I know it's scary, terrifying actually… being here." His voice was soft and I could tell he was trying to look into my eyes as I sat with my knees curled into my chest and my fringe covering part of my face.

"It's not just that," I mumbled, shaking the hair out of my way before I continued, "I was right earlier, wasn't I?" I questioned, finally looking up at him and a few seconds later I got a stiff nod in return, "Did me volunteering for her make it worse?" Another nod.

"Why did you do it anyway, volunteer?"

I thought about the question and my answer to it for a moment. In the start I didn't know, it was a rash decision to help someone who had helped me for so long; but it was more than that. If my family didn't have Annie, they couldn't carry on. If they didn't have me they'd be perfectly fine.

"When my Dad – when he… when he died… I spent every waking moment making sure that my brother and sister would survive, that they would eat and go to school and have a place to sleep at night. I spent all my time focusing on how to keep us all going, how to make sure that my Father's death wouldn't lead to us losing everything we had and I did it, I made sure that we were fine. I couldn't stop Mum though, yeah she got us money but she was never there because – because the way she got the money was what Snow forces you to do now, except my Mother had a _choice._ She had a choice to go and get another _proper_ job, but instead she _chose_ to sell herself to the scumbags in our town and half the time they never even paid her. It was like she didn't even care that she had three children at home, a fourteen year old running the house and making sure her brother and sister didn't die. But she finally came back to us, she was offered a job making nets and it paid better than anything else we could think of, so she cleaned up and she took it. I guess I never really forgave her for going off the rails when she had the perfect opportunity in front of her… After that the stress wasn't on me as much and for the first time in two years – when I was sixteen – I was able to grieve for my Dad and that's when it happened. Annie was a girl in my class, we weren't friends but we weren't strangers, she helped over the time I was trying to keep everything going…. I had a break down one day, the kids were whining and begging and I couldn't take it so I screamed at them and left. I left them alone. If it wasn't for Annie going round to check on us they probably would have burnt the house down or got taken or something. I didn't go back for three days, I sat on the beach and I cried for three days straight until Annie found me and took me home. The kids didn't even care that I left them, they just hugged me and said it was nice I was back. Ever since then Annie was always helping and Senna admires everything about her… Annie's been a better sister to them than I have and if she was here, we probably would be starving right now."

I hung my head in shame as I finished the story, wiping the tears that had fallen away from my eyes. Finnick hadn't said a word the whole time I was talking, he just sat there and listened and even after I stopped he stayed silent. He stayed silent until a few minutes later, when I felt his presence right beside me and a hand push my hair away from my face and then lightly push my chin upwards so my gaze met his.

"You're wrong."


	5. Chapter 4

"What?" I breathed, Finnick's words still swirling around in my head as I attempted to tear my eyes away from his but I was locked in a trance.

"You're wrong, didn't you hear half the things you said? You spent two years keeping your siblings alive – if that isn't being a sister I don't know what is," I smiled at him even though tears were still flowing down my cheeks and once more I felt my cheeks flush as he wiped them away, "It's my fault you're here anyway."

I shook my head, moving so I could sit up properly, "It's Snow's fault. It's not like Annie would have survived – she's too kind – _not that I'll survive either_."

I muttered the last part of that sentence, but somehow the boy next to me heard and gave me a look.

"Mari," He whispered, "I saw you throw that trident on the beach, you're amazing. You could easily win just by using that alone."

His compliment washed over me and I gave him a questioning look, ignoring completely what he said and realised that he – or he and Annie – would know that I saw them fighting too.

"Why were you two fighting?" I asked, not really embarrassed to ask him personal questions anymore, after pouring out my life story only a few minutes before.

"About me refusing, ironically. She never really understood it, why I had to keep going off to the Capitol all the time and I was too ashamed to tell her, too worried that she would tell people I was a whore – which was madness because Annie is pretty much the nicest person ever. But when I finally told her, she kept saying how it wouldn't matter if I said no, to tell Snow I would sleep with that person another day and it wasn't until about a week and a half ago that I actually did it. And he wasn't happy. We were arguing that morning because I told her I couldn't do it again, that he'd warned me."

I noticed something in his eyes as he told the story, a glint of something that some might think was a twinkle, but it was just a glint – a glint of guilt? But he had no choice, I knew that he knew that and would never feel guilty for protecting the people he loved; but then why would he be guilty? Unless…

"Do you love her?" My question was blunt and so was the answer he gave.

"No. No and I feel horrible because I put her through that – I just needed someone, I honestly did like her in the beginning because who wouldn't like Annie? But I don't love her, we haven't got the spark we used to have, not after all the fights we had and I just don't-"

"Finnick!" I exclaimed, cutting him off from his ramble and making him look at me, much like he did to myself earlier on, "I understand," I looked behind him, the clock making me become aware of just how late it was, "Let's go to bed, it's really late."

"Yeah, sorry about keeping you up." He said, picking up his shoes and jacket but I shook my head at him, getting up myself and moving in the direction of the bedrooms.

"Night, Finnick."

"Night Mari, sweet dreams."

XX

The next morning I woke to the sound of heels clicking on the floor by my bed and I scrunched up my face in confusion, no one in my family wore heels… And then I remembered where I was. And I remembered everything about the day before, especially looking weak in front of Finnick. I slowly opened my eyes, blinking a few times to adjust to the brightly coloured image before me. Iunia had changed her yellow wig to a bright green one and her makeup was seemingly made to look like the roots of a tree – I didn't dare question it.

"Come on! You need to get ready young lady! Big day today, first lot of training and there's a meeting in the kitchen in ten minutes!"

I winced as she squealed so close to my ear rolling over to look at the clock. After my chat with Finnick I'd only gotten about seven hours sleep and I had a tiring day, meaning I was more tired than usual. I ran a hand through my hair as I got out of bed, stretching once I stood up and smiled when I saw that my prep team had put everything out for me. I pulled on the black skin-tight trousers, sports tank and trainers and tied my hair in a side ponytail, not bothering to do anything but cover up the dark circles underneath my eyes before rushing out to the kitchen. Once again, I was the last to the table and I apologised as I sat down, loading my plate with bacon as Finnick began to give us a pep talk. I watched him as he spoke - telling us not to show our talents just yet; to make sure we knew how to survive in the wild and to gather information about the other tributes – he looked like he could fall asleep again any second, but the mask was back up and he was being strong again. I took in what he said and reminded myself to get Mags' advice too, since she didn't say much but other than that I ate in silence and waited patiently for everyone else to finish before we made our way down to the training centre.

The closer we got, the sicker I felt and I could feel my palms begin to get clammy. This was it, this was what was going to prepare me for these games.

"Remember what I said," I jumped as I heard Finnick's deep voice right next to my ear, "Don't show them your trident skills just yet."

I forced a smile and nodded at him rigidly, before turning back to face the doors of the lift as they opened and we were ushered out. After one last brief, they sent us on our way, telling us that they would be watching us closely and not to worry about anyone but ourselves. I was about to walk through the door when I remembered what I told myself and rushed back over to them as their figures retreated.

"Mags!" I called, stopping front of her as she smiled at me, "Do _you_ have any advice?"

The old woman smiled and nodded, making me listen eagerly, "Think… 'bout who you fight for."

And then she started walking away with the others again, leaving me to stand there with a puzzled look on my face for a few seconds before I realised that I had left Coy standing on his own. I breathed an apology to him before walking into the training centre first, him trailing behind me and automatically felt out of place. The first people I saw were the careers, who looked me over once before staring at Coy like he was a piece of meat, effectively making him hide slightly more behind me. We all stood in our Districts as Atala explained to us how everything was going to work, the rules and gave us statistics on how it was more likely you would die from infection than from combat. And then we were free to do what we wanted from then on. I immediately made my way over to the survival stations, deciding to begin on the knot tying station. The trainer was excited that someone had taken an interest in them and he showed me how to make the best types of knots for all different situations. We were in the midst of creating a knot that would keep me securely tied to a branch of a tree when I felt another presence next to me. The trainer explained to them as well before letting us continue to practice. I looked out the corner of my eye and found that it was the girl from Twelve next to me.

She was wearing the same thing as me, except her tank said 12 and mine said 4. She was pretty and tall, her blond hair tied up into a bun on the top of her head and had a good talent for tying knots as it seemed, from what she was doing. I decided that even though Finnick had said not to interact too much on the first day, that I would try and be nice to her, she looked like she could be a good ally.

_"I'm Mari."_

_"I'm Ivy." _

I chuckled slightly as we spoke at the same time, putting my rope down and holding my hand out, grinning as she shook it. We shook in silence for a few seconds before she opened her mouth to say something, but closed it quickly afterwards. I raised an eyebrow and gave and encouraging smile, gesturing for her to continue.

"How old are you?" She asked.

"Eighteen, you?" I replied, she looked about my age but her answer shocked me.

"Sixteen. So it was your last year, you could have been safe."

I nodded slightly, gulping before speaking again, "Yeah… but I volunteered so I guess it's my own fault."

Giving her a shrug I picked up the rope once more, continuing to tie the knot I had already started. Ivy seemed to understand that I didn't want to talk about it and did the same, leaving the air around us slightly tense as we worked.

XX

Ivy and I spent the whole day training together, going around the survival stations and chatting every so often about our Districts and comparing them. It was until we took a lunch break when we actually had a full conversation, sitting on our own in the corner of the canteen waiting for our District partners - who had seemed to get on well - to join us. We were talking about types of jobs in Districts Four and Twelve and how in a way they weren't that different except one dealt with fish and one dealt with coal.

"So what does your Dad do?" I asked, taking a bite of my bread and noticed Ivy's face visibly pale.

"Um, my Dad died in a mining accident last year."

I placed a hand on hers, understanding how she felt, "I understand how it feels, my Dad's boat sank about five years ago, no one survived except the peacekeeper in charge."

"Does it get better?"

I thought about my answer for a few seconds. Did it get better? It did, but it took a long time for me, but I guess that was my fault, I didn't help myself come to terms with it.

"Yeah it gets better, just make sure you grieve though, that's really all you can do."

Ivy looked up at me, her blue eyes piercing into my own green ones as she held her hand out to me this time.

"So, allies?"

I grinned and shook her hand, nodding, "Allies."

XX

"So, the girl from Twelve?"

I rolled my eyes at Finnick as he handed me my hot chocolate. We were sat on the windowsill once more, everyone else having gone to bed a few minutes earlier; we probably should have gone too, but he wanted to talk to me about something.

"Was that it?" I sighed, having a feeling he was about to lecture me, "I'm not in the mood for a-"

"Lecture?" I looked at him, surprised as he cut me off, "I told you not to make allies yet and you did, I figured you expected one. All I'm saying is don't get attached to her, to anyone because if it comes down to you in the final two – it'll be that much harder to kill her."

My sudden glare seemed to shock him, but then again he was used to talking to people like that, I wasn't. I wasn't accustomed to chatting about killing people who were my age and up to six years younger so casually like he was.

"You think it wouldn't be hard anyway?" I spat at him, making to get up and leave when his hand grasped my arm, pulling me forcefully into him.

"You seem to forget I went through this too and I was a lot younger than you when I did it, so don't go pretending I don't know how you feel."

My anger turned into embarrassment as he growled at me and I closed my eyes, hanging my head so it came into contact with his chest. His grip on my arm loosened and I didn't know why, but I started crying, the tears wouldn't stop falling from my eyes and I thought back to that moment on the train, when Finnick had wrapped his arms around me. To my surprise, only a few seconds later he did just that, holding me to him by the waist but this time resting his chin on the top of my head. It was exactly like before, except both of us were upset, both of us were scared and both of us were crying. His tears came out of nowhere. All I knew was after a few minutes I could feel something dropping onto the top of my head and when I heard the light sniffs coming from above I knew what it was.

I don't know how long we stood there for, just letting our sadness flow, combining through the embrace we were fixed in, but it was long enough for it to suddenly occur to me that this wasn't how a mentor and a tribute were supposed to act around each other. He was supposed to make sure I stayed strong and give me advice on how to win the games, not cry with me when I'm sobbing into his shirt.

"I should go to bed." I exhaled, pulling myself out of his arms, feeling an odd sense of loneliness as soon as I did and wiped my eyes.

"Okay."

And with that I left him standing by himself in the dark room, with only the light of the Capitol coming in from the window to keep him company.


	6. Chapter 5

Finnick and I didn't speak at all throughout the next day. He would be giving us advice on what to work on and how to make allies but he would only look at Coy and he would offer him things at breakfast, not me – so why did I catch him staring whenever no one was talking? And if he was so annoyed, why would he bother getting Mags to watch over me and tell her not to tell me it was his idea – which she obviously did. It felt somehow unnatural to not be talking or sharing looks all the time, I'd only known him two days but it felt like forever. What was I thinking? I didn't even know much about him. It's just that he seemed to be the only one in the training centre, no, the whole of Panem… that understood me. Ivy and I were at the spear station and I was picking it up pretty easy since I could throw tridents, so I stood back and let her have a go, except that meant I got distracted again. Ever since I had spotted him with the rest of the Victors overlooking us, I hadn't been able to stop looking. Once in a while, he would turn to look at me too and we would lock eyes for a moment before I would turn away. This time he was in the middle of a conversation with Mags; his hands waving about as he made her (and himself) laugh; I couldn't help but smile lightly.

"Who ya starin' at?"

I gasped and held my hand to my heart as Ivy moved from behind me to beside me after scaring the living daylights out of me. I bit my lip as her eyes followed the path mine did a few minutes before and settled at the exact space Finnick was sitting in. Her eyebrows raised and a slightly judging look was pointed at me.

"He should be the one watching you. You've spent most of the day looking at him in between stations, during practice – why?"

I shook my head, not wanting to get into it, Ivy was another person I barely knew, yet I was trusting with not killing or getting me killed in the arena. Her and Finnick were pretty much the same to me, except Finnick was so much more than just an ally – but he told me all those things about how good of a sister I was and then completely broke me down within a day.

"Okay then, if you wanna talk, I'm here."

For the rest of the day, I kept myself busy so I wouldn't be tempted to look up to where he sat, meaning I was exhausted by the time training ended and almost passed out on the sofa as soon as we got back. Iunia was talking to us about how well it seemed we were doing or something along those lines… I stopped paying attention after about five words tumbled out of her yellow painted mouth. I felt my eyes grow heavy and I had to blink a few times to keep myself awake, sitting up straighter and trying to focus on what was being said, but my body had different ideas and I quickly fell asleep then and there.

XX

I groaned as I opened my eyes, getting a shock when I found myself sitting in exactly the same place, but with Mags directly in front of me and nothing else. I looked around, finding that everyone else had obviously left the room to let me sleep, or I was snoring… I really hoped it wasn't the latter.

"Sorry for falling asleep." I muttered, wiping a hand over my face out of fatigue. Mags just shook her head at me.

"Talks about you." Was all she said and immediately I knew what she was talking about – I mean who else would it have been.

"Who, Finnick?" I raised my eyebrows and bit my lip when she nodded, sighing, my frustration on the matter showing, "And did he tell you how much of an idiot I was yesterday?"

I got another nod.

"Come in now."

I gave her a confused look, what did she mean by that and she didn't even say it very loud. But all I got was a look saying just-stay-there when after a few seconds nothing happened before she stalked out the door, looking very menacing for a woman of her age. I did as I was told and sat on the sofa with my hands fidgeting as I questioned what was going on. Finnick had obviously told Mags what had happened, but how had she taken it, how had _he _taken it. I didn't mean to hurt him, even though I know I did but if I could go back I wouldn't change what I said, because that's life, you get hurt, you hurt people and that's how you test yourself and them. My eyes snapped towards the door as it once more opened, finding my mouth become dry as it wasn't Mags coming back into the room.

Neither of us spoke, I didn't have the courage to and I guess he just didn't know what to say. I looked at him again and he looked different from how he did the rest of the day, he looked more tired. I could see the bags underneath his eyes, his hair was curling slightly at the ends and his eyes had this haunted look in them. It took me a minute to realise that he had taken his mask off, that he was completely and utterly letting me see the side of him he hid from everyone – the broken side.

"Finnick-" I started, but his steps towards me stopped me from making any more sound.

"I wanted to talk to you about why I was ignoring you, not about what happened last night," I nodded, hoping he would take my silence for me telling him to continue, "Can we go somewhere more private?"

"My room?" I don't know why I suggested it and I regretted it as soon as it came out of my mouth but Finnick's agreement shocked me even more than my proposal.

The air turned awkward again as we left the living room, walking past Mags and narrowly avoiding getting called back by anyone else. I led him in, sitting down on the edge of the bed as I waited for him to tell me why he had been so brazenly ignoring me.

"I didn't ignore you because I was angry with you, or upset," I was confused, how could what I said not make him upset or angry at me? "Even though I was. I ignored you because no one else has ever made me feel like this before. Now, I'm not saying this in a romantic way, at least I think I'm not. But when you said that yesterday even though I was furious, I needed your company. I didn't want you to go to bed when you pulled away, I wanted you to stay and sit on the windowsill with me and distract me from everything so I could sleep without the nightmares. The past couple days after talking to you I could sleep soundly in my bed when I usually have restless nights tossing and turning and being terrified of things that could happen to people I care about. And somehow you've made it onto that list. I found myself thinking about you all the time and about how I would do anything to keep you safe in that arena and I didn't know how to deal with it. So I decided to watch from afar; as I think you noticed," he chuckled bitterly, referring to the numerous moments we locked eyes over training, "to try and find out what it was that made you so damn… intoxicating. Mags told me to talk to you, Johanna told me to talk to you, my heart told me to talk to you so I'm talking to you. Huh, and you're staring at me like you couldn't comprehend a word I just said."

He made to leave, thinking my blank face was a bad sign; that I didn't understand. But it wasn't. I understood perfectly. Finnick had just explained everything I couldn't in less than two minutes and I had no idea what to think. He felt exactly how I felt about the situation. Suddenly, I jumped up from the bed and reached my hand out, clenching it as it came into contact with the fabric of the bronze haired boy's shirt and used all the force I could to turn him back to me.

"Ten?" I ask, smiling when I see the grin spread on his face and then it faded as his did too.

"Make it eleven, I have a… meeting." I nodded, a more reassuring smile on my face this time as I pulled him into a hug, engulfing myself in the warmth he brought.

XX

I fiddled with the hem of the grey fabric dress I was wearing, once more one of the only plain things in the wardrobe suitable for my taste. I curled my legs underneath myself as I sat on the windowsill waiting for Finnick to get back, with two cups of hot chocolate steaming next to me. It wasn't long before the lift shot up and stopped on the floor, the door opening with a swish and outstepped a weary looking Victor, who I now realised hadn't won anything at all. I handed him his mug as he walked over, taking my own in my cold hands and revelling at the heat now coursing through me.

"Thanks." He smiled lightly, taking off his jacket and shoes before sitting down in a similar position to mine.

Today I was just going to distract him, the thoughts of him having nightmares every night that made it hard for him to get a minutes rest had been haunting me since our talk, so I planned out that I was just going to get to know him better.

"Okay, Mr Odair, ready for your interrogation?" I chuckled at the scared look he gave me before shaking my head, "Joking, I was just going to ask a few questions… What's your middle name?"

"I don't have one – don't look so shocked! My parents didn't think it was necessary… you?"

"Peninah," I put on a hurt look as he burst out laughing, "It means Pearl, which was my grandmother's name – oh stop laughing!" I exclaimed, covering my mouth to stop me from letting my giggles out as well.

After a few minutes, he sobered up, face straight again, "What are your brother and sister called?"

I raised an eyebrow, "Thought I was the one asking the questions, Odair, did I give you permission to speak when not spoken to?" His look made me know he knew I was stalling and I sighed, "My brother's called Kai and my sister's called Senna – they're twins. What about you, hey?"

"I have a little brother," I was stunned, I didn't think Finnick actually had any family apart from his Dad, his brother never came up anywhere, "His name is Warden – I don't really know why they named him that, but he's a good kid."

I could tell by the dullness Finnick's eyes now held that he missed his little brother when he was away, but it was to keep him safe. I knew it would kill me to leave the twins for so long at a time and probably not even tell them why, so it must be even harder for Finnick because he doesn't really have anyone else who knew the him before the games. Deciding to change the subject I set my mug down and made myself comfortable before leaning forward.

"What's your favourite colour?"

Finnick laughed, his eyes turning back slightly as he took a sip of his drink before replying, "Um… blue, I guess."

I shook my head, making a face at him, "No 'I guess', just the first colour that pops into your head. So Finnick, what's your favourite colour?"

"Green," He blurts straight away and I smirk to myself, "Forest green though. Forest green because it's not too dark of a green which makes something look sinister, but it's not too light that all there is to it is childlike games and spring buds. It's got a fight in it, like it's bold and stands out but it's also slightly bright in some parts where the need for innocence takes over, like being able to hide something at any moment and where you can be completely oblivious to everything going on around you but when you do realise something happens it doesn't hit you as hard because you are so focused on making the aftermath of what happened less horrible that it takes time for you to understand what happened and come to terms with it… You?"

It took me a few minutes before I could even blink again, let alone conjure up words like that. But I tried anyway after a good think about it.

"Bronze is my favourite colour. Everyone thinks bronze is overrated, that it's just third in command to silver and gold – manipulated easily too - and it's not useful for much except looking good and cheap. But it's valuable, worth so much more than people think, it's used for everything because its strong and it's just beautiful. It's red and its copper and its gold all mixed into one. And it's the colour of autumn. I don't know I guess it's just special, a mystery to everyone but I guess that's why it's so interesting to me, how can one simple thing that's in the same category as thousands of other things just like it be so unique and so stunning? It's just different and I admire that."

I stopped rambling and it came to my attention what I was really talking about. Then I replayed back what Finnick said in my brain and picked apart the phrases he used and the way he spoke. My eyes were forest green; his hair was bronze. We'd just described our perception of each other through colours, our favourite colours… which just so happened to have something in common with each one of us. What was going on?


	7. Chapter 6

"Hey, you have any nightmares?"

I whispered to Finnick as I passed the bacon over to Coy at the breakfast table the next day. We'd ignored the whole colour thing and continued to talk about what we liked to do, our families and just random topics that came to our minds. I found out Finnick's coping mechanism is tying knots and that he used to help his Dad out at work when he was off school and that he valued Mags as a mother, not just a mentor. I didn't think I'd laughed like I had then in years.

"No, just a bit restless, it's weird." I smiled, glad me talking to him helped and smirked as I put some egg on to my plate.

"Like I'm protecting you from them?" I joked, giving him a little nudge and winking.

"Yeah, maybe…" he chuckled, taking the bowl from me and adding eggs to his own meal. We sat in silence again for a few seconds before he leant over, "I wanna try something tonight."

"What?" I questioned as I put a fork of sausage in my mouth.

"Just wait until tonight."

I wanted to say something, but Iunia started jabbering on about how it was our last day of training and we needed to make sure we had a plan and a way to survive. I knew what I was going to do – Ivy and I were going to grab what we could before running off to find shelter. In my private session, I planned to use a trident, a spear and show them my survival skills because that should get me a good enough score for sponsors but not to make myself a target. Coy on the other hand, well I didn't know what he was going to do, he hadn't seemed to even try the weapon stations, just the survival ones. I was worried for him, so worried.

After breakfast, we went down to the training centre and I found Ivy as soon as I walked through the door, her arms already holding a bow, ready to begin practicing. I had to say, she was a natural with it. I greeted her before walking over to the tridents for the second time over the course of training, except I was actually going to show my skill this time. I could feel the careers staring at me from across the room, so I picked up the bronze trident from the rack; shook off the advice from the trainer and threw it as hard as I could at the dummy. Straight in the head. I did the same again, except this time getting the heart and the abdomen of the dummies in front of me. I could hear the whispering behind me and I rolled my eyes, continuing to train for the next hour or two before joining Ivy at the spears. Lutz and Livia were from District One, Cyra and Hazen from District Two – they all volunteered like I did, but they volunteered because they wanted to win, they wanted to kill everyone else in the room.

The whole day was spent completely focused on making sure I was prepared for the games and for my private session the next day. One more day before we were thrust into the arena and made to kill each other. Still, the wonder of what Finnick wanted to do was in the back of my mind, trying to fight its way into a distraction, but I didn't let it – I focused.

XX

Once back on the District Four floor, I waited for Finnick to say something, but he didn't. He and Mags just had their own conversation as I sat next to Coy, checking with him that he learnt things and telling him a few things he'd missed about making fires. The apartment had a heavy atmosphere that night, with all of us worrying about the next day and even more about the day after that. It seemed like forever before we were called for dinner and my mouth watered at the scent of the lamb stew we were having. Still not a word from Finnick other than _'can you pass the pepper?' _and it was getting frustrating. Luckily for me, everyone went to bed pretty early and as soon as they did I turned to him, an expectant look on my face.

"Just go to your room," he sighed and I made to protest but he cut me off before a word even came out my mouth, "Do it, go!"

He was jumpy and nervous so I decided to do as he said and made my way to my room, slightly disappointed I didn't get to find out what he wanted to try. I pulled on the comfiest thing I could find and laid down on the bed, the covers already warm. I was just about to shut the light off when the door creaked open and the bronze hair poked around the frame.

"What are you doing?" I raised my eyebrow as he slowly made his way inside when he saw I was decently dressed.

"Look, I just wanted to try something. You can say no if you don't want to. I- I want t-to sleep with you."

I was shocked, both by what he said and the fact he had stuttered while saying it, he never stuttered, "You what?"

"Like, just in your bed, next to you?" At my still freaked out face he sighed and ran a hand over his own face, "The nightmares pretty much leave after I talk to you, I want to see whether they go completely if we're in the same bed."

I thought about it for a few seconds, yeah it was a weird thing to suggest, but he had a point. If just talking to me before he went to bed made the nightmares bearable and less scary, sleeping near me might make him not even have them – it was like I said at breakfast, it was like I was protecting him from them. And seeing Finnick like I saw him the day before, so vulnerable, was not the Finnick I wanted to see.

"Okay." I breathed, siting up straighter.

"I mean, I'll just leave if you want me to, you don't have to – _wait,_ you're okay with it?" I chuckled and nodded at his rambling and sudden realisation before pulling the covers back and patting the bed next to me.

"Yep, climb in Odair."

I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, even more so when he actually lied down next to me and I did the same, settling into the mattress and turning to face him with my head resting on the pillow.

"Thanks for this." His face was inches from mine and I could feel his breath on me, making me shiver.

"Don't worry about it." I whispered, smiling lightly before closing my eyes and attempting to fall asleep.

"Night Mari, sweet dreams."

"Night Finnick, you too."

XX

I opened my eyes slowly, only to come face to face with Finnick's chest right in front of me. His arms were wrapped around my waist and mine were around his torso, effectively pulling us together; we must have moved in our sleep. Speaking of sleep, if we were this close, Finnick can't have had any nightmares whatsoever. The more I thought about it, the weirder it seemed though. A tribute and a mentor shouldn't be doing this, they shouldn't be in the same room at night, let alone sleeping in the same bed, let alone cuddling in said bed as they slept. But why did it feel so right? Suddenly an image flashed in my mind and I felt guilt fall over me – Annie. I completely forgot about Annie, then again, so had Finnick and he was her boyfriend. I felt horrible.

I heard a small groan come from above and looked up to see Finnick's eyes fluttering open and I smiled at him when he looked down at me and how we were situated.

"So it worked?" I spoke awkwardly, not knowing how he was comprehending it.

After a few seconds, he still made no move to unwrap his arms from my waist, so I kept mine where they were and waited for a reply to my question.

"Yeah," he grinned sleepily, "best sleep I've had in five years," I looked at him, shocked, that was a long time to have nightmares for, unless… "The games have their effects on you, different for every Victor, but everyone has nightmares – even the careers."

I nodded and tried to pull away but Finnick just kept me in place, he was a lot stronger than I was. So we stayed as we were for a while, just lying in silence, so neither of us expected what happened next. The door to my room swung open and a smirking Mags stood in the doorway, hands on hips and we flew away from each other as she narrowed her eyes at us.

"Ten minutes." She sighed before walking off and –thankfully – closing the door as she went, leaving us to gather our wits and get out of bed.

Finnick left me to change and I did so quickly, eager to eat before we had to go down and wait for the private sessions to begin. I put my hair in two braids and made sure I looked presentable from every angle before going to meet everyone in the kitchen. For once, I wasn't the last to arrive when I got there as Finnick turned up a few minutes after, taking the seat next to me and giving everyone a nod as greeting. It was the same as every morning, except today meant so much more than just training – the pep talks went on and on but today I listened, needing a confidence boost and listening to Finnick's voice kind of helped calm me down. We got down there just before ten o'clock, which was when Livia would be called in for her session, then Lutz, then Cyra, Hazen, District 3 and then me. One more set of advice from Finnick and Iunia, and a reassuring hug from Mags had us being sent to sit with the other tributes. I turned back at the last second, finding myself locking eyes with him like I had done so many times before over the past few days and nodded, getting a throwing motion back. _Throw the trident_.

I waited with my hands shaking and my brain willing them to stop before I got in there, so I would ruin my chances with a dodgy throw. By the time the boy from District Three went in, I was doing breathing exercises to stop myself from panicking too much.

_"Mari Gallagher."_ The drone called and I stood, smiling lightly at Coy before walking into the room and standing in front of the game makers, doing what I was told to.

"Mari Gallagher, District Four."

After a nod from the head game-maker I went over to the survival station, quickly making a few fires and tying the knots I had learnt. I didn't spend too much time on that before I made my way to the tridents, giving a glance over my shoulder to make sure they were watching, which they were, before getting ready. I got in the right stance, breathed and let go. Heart. And again, stance, breathe, head. Stance, breathe, stomach. Every time, in the place the screen told me to hit. I could hear murmurs but I didn't acknowledge them, I just stalked over to the spears and threw them too, bull's-eye every time. I'd practiced hard, I'd furthered the knowledge I had from Four and made myself a way to survive in combat in the games, a way to survive in conditions they gave us. Once finished, I stood in front of them and at my dismissal gave a sharp nod before turning and walking out the door.

It took all I had to stop myself from falling into Finnick's arms when I saw him standing and waiting. I shook of Iunia's attempts at getting me to go upstairs, wanting to wait for Coy to come out and see how he thought he did. I stood next to the sea-eyed boy and lightly leant against him, letting my worry show through that one movement that I just had a hunch he would understand. And out of nowhere, I felt a strong hand grasp mine and I looked up at him, getting a pained smile and returning it with one of my own – still clutching his hand in mine. Coy stumbled out a few minutes later, a passive expression on his face and Mags lightly asked him how it went.

"Okay, I guess." The younger boy shrugged and I offered him a small smile, which he gladly returned before turning to go to the lift, forgetting my hand was entwined with Finnick's, meaning I was pulled back before I could even go two feet.

"Sorry." He muttered and let go, but I suddenly felt a rush of cold blow over me as he did so, starting from my hand and travelling around my whole body. I wanted to grab his hand again, but I thought better of it, walking away.

XX

The living room was loud as Paisley, Albidella, Caldesia and Solveig had joined us, along with Coy's prep team and stylist, so we could all watch the scores together. I sat on my own on a chair in the corner, with Finnick and Mags on the small sofa next to me, both turning to say something once in a while or in Finnick's case, just stare at me and smile. I really didn't know what was happening, but I was scared for it to end.

"Oh, they're starting!"

Paisley exclaimed - pointing to the screen with the hand that wasn't holding the alcohol – and sure enough Ceasar Flickerman was on there, green hair and eyebrows standing out as he began the score 'show' as the Capitol lot called it. It was typical to begin with, Lutz got a 10, Livia a 9, Haven a 9 and Cyra a 10. Not unsurprising for career tributes. District 3's boy got a 7, but unfortunately for the girl, she got a 4. And then I got nervous again. Ceasar announced our District and I sat up straight, closing my eyes and waiting for the average score I expected – but it didn't come.

"Mari Gallagher – 10."

My eyes flew open and everyone squealed, my prep team jumping up and down and I turned to Finnick, grinning like a mad man and hurriedly pulled him off the sofa and into a hug, which he reciprocated immediately. After a few seconds, I realised Coy's score still had to be read out and I adjusted myself so I could watch the screen again, waiting.

"Coy Mallory – 8."

I turned to the boy who reminded me so much of my brother and grinned at the relieved and happy look on his face – he had a chance. We both had a chance. I looked back up at Finnick again and gulped seeing him biting his lip while looking down at me. I pulled away from his embrace as I realised I was still in it, only to have him grab my arm and lean down to whisper in my ear.

"My room this time."


	8. Chapter 7

We did end up sleeping in Finnick's bed that night, but this time it didn't take our subconscious' to tangle us together while we were sleeping, it was just an instant reflex once we were next to each other. So when I woke up with my face pressed against his chest again, I didn't really think much about it, until I realised I didn't think much about it which made me think about it a lot. The thought that it was so wrong came back into my mind, we shouldn't have been doing it. I heard a low moan from Finnick and he began to shift slightly, signalling that he was going to wake up. I smiled at him as his eyes opened and got a sleepy one in return. Seeing him so at peace made me even more conflicted.

"Finn," I said quietly, still not really knowing what I was going to say, "What is this?"

That was the best I could do. I didn't know how to word it, I didn't know what _it_ even was entirely. _It _was some strange connection Finnick and I had suddenly gained for no reason, with no cause.

"I'm not sure," Was his answer as he removed a hand from my waist to run it through his unusually flat hair – it was only like that if he didn't put anything in it – before sighing loudly, "I just know I don't want it to stop."

I groaned and buried my head deeper into his chest, feeling exactly the same way.

"The games start tomorrow Finnick and have you completely forgotten about your girlfriend?" I questioned, pulling away from him.

"I'll break up with her."

I was stunned. Did he really mean that, he would drop everything with Annie just so he could find out what this thing we had was? I knew he didn't love her, but they were Finnick and Annie… And did he even think of me romantically like I did him? I tried to deny it, but the whole situation was too weird for us to just be really close friends, I would be lying if I said I didn't like Finnick. I took a deep breath and threw the covers off myself, revealing my jumper and shorts I had worn to bed and climbed out, not ready to talk about it just yet.

"I need to go before someone finds us." I muttered, rushing to the door and into the empty corridor.

XX

I spent the rest of the morning with Iunia, working through how I was supposed to sit and _talk_ and _walk_ while I was on stage with Ceasar. The heels she put me in left bruises on my toes and heels and I think I did something to my ankle when I fell over because the heels were _six inches high_. It did annoy me, how all Iunia really cared about was how I looked and how I acted; because to her, if I wasn't perfect; she would have a tribute who wasn't worthy of sponsors. It always ran through my mind, why did the Capitol citizens find such entertainment from watching children kill each other? Like how did anyone persuade them to let these games happen in the first place? It was sick. Obviously I was bias because I was from the Districts, but I've seen how the games affect people, especially tributes – like Finnick. He was so broken, so confused about everything and he didn't have anyone to confide in, no one to help with the nightmares until I came along.

"Mari!" I blinked as the high voice shrieked in my ear, "You need to listen! You need to go to Mags and Finnick now, we don't have much time until you have to be taken to beauty base zero!"

Thanking her with a forced smile, I moved out the room and down the hall into the living room where Mags and Finnick were waiting for me. I passed Coy on the way in, getting a slight smile in return of my reassuring one and sat down opposite the two victors.

"Okay, what angle do you want to go for?" Finnick asked me, a slight edge to his voice and I worried that he was angry with me. At my blank look he continued, "I was thinking good girl who just wants to get back to her siblings, but with a sexy undertone."

I nodded, that was a logical step, all the women and probably most of the men would love the family thing, but a lot of the sponsors were men and having that sexy edge would help – only thing was that I wasn't sexy. I was plain as anyone could be and I had no curves or anything, so how was I going to do that? I voiced this and they both began to give me tips on how to make myself appealing – Mags was mostly telling me about be kind and joking with Ceasar, Finnick's was more 'lean forward with your chest kind of thing. I was fine with that, he was trying to help me, but how he phrased things made me blush and think about him thinking about my 'attractive figure', as he put it.

By the time my prep team showed up I knew pretty much every which way to be cheeky, sell my sadness and make my figure stand out. And by the time they'd started cleansing my face I began to lose my cool slightly, I was so worried about messing up and making a fool of myself but I still had the thoughts of what Finnick had said looming over me. I was going to die in that arena, I knew it, he probably knew it too – so why did he tell me he would break up with Annie? My head was spinning and I couldn't focus on anything they were saying or doing, their Capitol accents getting lost in the noise of the hair appliances and the noise of the hair appliances getting lost in the midst of my thoughts.

"MARI!" I gasped, my eyes focusing in on Paisley's face, "Honey, Solveig's ready for you."

"Sorry!" I exclaimed, jumping up and moving over to get changed.

Solveig walked in with a large black bag in her hands and a grin on her lips. Hanging it up, she stepped over and hugged me before taking my hands in hers and looking me over. I bit my lip, I didn't have a clue what I looked like, since the prep team had refused to let me watch them in the mirror this time.

"Is it alright?" I asked timidly, suddenly feeling awfully self-conscious.

"Honey, you look beautiful," I smiled lightly as she cupped my face and gave me a meaningful look, "Now!" I blinked as she clapped her hands together and walked over to the black bag, "People were going crazy for your goddess look, you really made them notice you out there, so we're going to step it up."

I raised my eyebrows and my mouth dropped open as she unzipped the bag. I stepped into the dress and then the heels she put out in front of me, letting her adjust my hair and sorted out the straps before turning and finally looking in the mirror to see what they had made me look like. But I didn't see me. Instead I saw this stunning girl who was tall because of the black t-strap heels with sleek chocolate brown hair that was 'fishtail' braided to the side and gold accented eyes and lips, her body accentuated by the stunning dress that hung from her shoulders. The dress had a black 'x' shape halter neck with two straps going up either side as well and then from there on it was layers of night sky blue chiffon, pulled in at the waist by a black strap, covered in little glittery lights that looked like stars. This was not Mari Gallagher.

"Wow."

The sudden sound of the familiar voice in the room shocked me and I turned around clutching my hand to my heart. Finnick stood in the doorway with his hair hanging in loose curls, much like it was when we reconciled, but more – I liked it better that way – and dressed in a black suit with a midnight blue bow tie and lining. The lack of words coming from him made me more nervous than I already was and the blank look on his face didn't really help. Only then did I notice Mags standing slightly behind him, looking lovely in a light cream gown with her down as it usually was. I smiled lightly at her and shrugged, gesturing towards my attire.

"Goddess." I blushed and played with the ends of my hair as she pointed towards Finnick, "Thinks so too."

I shook my head and the boy next to her suddenly jumped and hurriedly turned to her, 'whispering' about how she shouldn't say things like that. I stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, looking at Solveig and rolling my eyes at her sniggering. Once they had all composed themselves, Solveig placed a hand on my shoulder and walked out the room, me slightly behind her as she started a conversation with the oldest Victor. I felt a new hand on my shoulder and nodded slightly at the bronze haired boy as he stepped next to me.

"Mags was uh, right, by the way," He muttered into my ear and I felt my face heat up once more, "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," I let out the breath I had been holding, "I like your hair better that way, if you care."

I snorted once I said that, he obviously didn't care. And then I blushed again, because I snorted. We continued walking in silence until we met with Coy and his stylist by the lift and I gave him a hug, tearing up slightly. He looked so grown up but not in the right way. They'd dressed him in a pair of light grey trousers and a matching waistcoat, white shirt and black tie. He looked dashing, but I suppose that was the point – this was all for people to like us, to like the look of us. Taking a deep breath, I stepped into the lift with everyone else and tried to organize my thoughts.

XX

The journey wasn't long at all, but it felt like forever, the seconds dragging into minutes and the minutes dragging into hours when it only took ten minutes to get through all the halls to the studio. I was amazed at the commotion going on, people trying to get us all into lines and others trying to stop Capitol reporters trying to get a glimpse of us all. Lutz, Livia, Cyra and Hazen were all whispering to each other as I walked by and I felt uncomfortable under their gaze, hoping to find Ivy before everything got started. I found her a few seconds later, sitting with her District partner in a beautiful red lace dress, her hair down in curls.

"Hey," I breathed as I got to her, "You look beautiful."

"Me?" She laughed, taking my hand, "Look at you!" I shook my head and rolled my eyes, "Good luck out there."

"You too." I smiled lightly, before pulling her into a hug.

Somehow Ivy had become my friend over the course of the few days we'd known each other and our alliance would be a strong one, what I was worried about was if we did get to the end of the games – what would we do then? I couldn't kill her. I didn't want to kill her. I didn't want to kill any of the other tributes at all. I span around as I heard my name being called and gave Ivy one last look before making my way over to the others and standing in line with Coy. The interviews started not long after and I wrinkled my nose at how casually the careers spoke about the games, joking with Ceasar – and the audience loved it. District Three were better, but they weren't interesting, in fact they were boring; really boring – but that just helped me out. When the boy walked off stage I began to panic, taking deep breaths and staring at the wall in front of me. It wasn't until a hand lightly grabbed mine that I truly calmed down.

"You'll be great." He told me and I bit my lip, looking up to the stage entrance and then back to him.

"Thank you."

_"Now, here is the beauty you've all been waiting for! The girl who made us really believe in Goddesses because she is one herself! MARI GALLAGHER OF DISTRICT FOUR!" _

I forced the largest smile I could onto my face and stepped out, the bright lights hitting me and I felt hot after just a few seconds of being out there. The crowd were intense, cheering and clapping and I couldn't even see the end of them as I waved. Caesar met me halfway, taking one of my hands in his and giving me a kiss on the cheek. He gave me a quiet greeting and I returned it, feeling overwhelmed by it all and sat down.

"Mari, you look stunning."

I blushed and laughed lightly at the man opposite me, his green hair, lips and eyebrows being slightly off putting, "Thank you, though I must say you look quite dashing yourself Caesar." I was doing it, I was trying to charm my way in.

"Why thank you," the Capitol man laughed, looking out into the audience, "But you, you have done nothing but impress us since you arrived in the Capitol Miss Gallagher. From the moment you stepped off the train, to now – how do you do it?"

"I'll be honest with you Caesar, I have no idea what you're talking about," the audience laughed and I gave them a light chuckle, "I'm honestly just being me and as for tonight and the Chariots, well that's all Solveig and the prep team – they're wonderful."

"So modest!" He exclaimed, slapping his hand on the side of his chair, "Now, onto serious matters… your home. What happened at your reaping with Annie Cresta?"

"Annie is important to my family, important to Four and certain other people," I looked out into the audience at Finnick, who had gone round after speaking to me, "She deserves to be at home."

"But your siblings?" I looked at Caesar and I was surprised to see what looked like genuine concern in his eyes.

"Senna and Kai have Annie and my Mum… and they have each other. I love them with all my heart and I just want them to be okay."

I could feel myself begin to get emotion, my eyes starting to water and the green haired man quickly changed the subject, asking me about my skills and how I got the ten. I managed to contain myself throughout the rest of the interview, answering Caesar's questions truthfully, cheekily and sometimes attempting to make a sexy little remark. But as soon as I got past Coy, giving him a pat on the shoulder for good luck and around the corner to watch I broke down, sobbing my heart out as I collapsed against the wall. No one else was there, the other Districts having gone to watch in the allocated seats, so I didn't try to stop myself. Only a few minutes later I heard a crash and the familiar pair of arms were hoisting me off the ground, letting me once again soak their owner's shirt. I could hear people talking in hostile tones, debating what to do for a while before I was being carefully lifted off the ground and carried off in a direction I couldn't comprehend. By the time I heard the lift I had calmed down significantly, but hadn't the energy to move, let alone even say anything. So I just let myself be carried into the apartment and undressed by a more feminine pair of hands before being laid down and comforted by Finnick's once more as I fell into a deep sleep.


	9. Chapter 8

"I'm scared." I whispered, burying my head in Finnick's chest as we laid in my bed.

It was the day I went into the games. I was terrified, how could I not be? I was going to die, I just knew that I wouldn't make it back unless it was in a coffin.

"I know, you have every right to be. But Mari," He placed a finger under my chin and tilted it upwards, "I'll do everything to make sure you get out of there alive."

There it was again. Him giving me these signals that messed with my head. I hated when he did it, but it also made my heart flutter and my cheeks heat up because it was like he really cared about me and liked me. But he couldn't. Because I was going to die. I decided to make him promise me something, if he really meant what he had been saying, that he would break up with Annie, that he would make sure I got out alive.

"Finn…" I trailed off, suddenly not having the courage as I looked into his eyes.

Jumping out of bed, I made my way to the door and turned back, my heart breaking at the sight of his worried face before going to have breakfast. He joined us a few minutes later, taking a seat on the opposite side of the table to me and loading his plate up. I did the same, savouring the last of the amazing food – the only thing I would miss about the Capitol. The meal was silent, apart from Iunia telling Coy to eat something or me to stop eating so quickly. I hated it. I'm not saying I wanted everyone to be all happy and have a jovial conversation, I just didn't want to be left with the thoughts in my head as they only thing comforting me before I went into the arena.

Once we were finished I got dragged off by Solveig, Paisley, Albidella and Caldesia who were all teary eyed but trying to keep professional. Even though they were weird and completely brainwashed by the Capitol, I'd become close to them over the past week from all our little conversations and they'd make me laugh when they saw I was nervous – they were almost my friends in a way. And they did the same as they always did. Took me down to _beauty base zero_ and then did my hair; no make-up for the games though; and then my outfit was brought out. It was simple, black thermal trousers, sturdy boots, long-sleeved thermal top and a green cargo jacket with my hair in two fishtail braids. I stood looking at myself in the mirror, my fear beginning to grow the more I saw what I was being portrayed as. I looked innocent, but with a hint of pure determination, but all I could see was the angel like side and it made me sick.

A few minutes later Solveig brought me out of my thoughts and told me it was time to go. I nodded, giving the prep team a once over before completely losing it and pulling them all into a hug. They whispered their words of luck and I moved away, thanking them before exiting the room I had become so used to. Coy stood with his stylist, Mags, Finnick and Iunia by the lift and I almost burst into tears at the sight of him, he was so young and he was being put into this arena – he had no hope.

We were silent again, but this time I was thankful for no one saying anything as we went out to the Hovercraft. I said thank you and goodbye to Mags, jumping when she pulled me in for a hug and then swapped over to Finnick as Coy went to the grey haired woman. I watched him for a second as he nodded to every small sentence she said, my chest tightening.

"Mari."

I turned, seeing the bronze haired boy standing there in all his glory. He looked perfect, like he always did. You wouldn't see it ordinarily, but I could, I could see the fear etched in to every part of him. How his hands were shaking, his eyes were wide and his feet were tapping almost silently on the floor; they were small things, but I noticed them immediately. Stepping to him, I covered his hands with my own, hoping to ease the trembling slightly but only adding to it as mine were unbeknownst to me doing the same thing.

"You don't have a token," He started, moving his hand into the pocket of his trousers and pulling something silver, "I-it was my Mother's, my Dad gave it to her when they first got together and she wore it all the time," I was silent, staring at the necklace he held in his hand, "You d-don't have to use it-"

"No, I'd love to have it as my token." I cut him off, carefully picking up the chain from his palm and turning it over in my hand.

It was a simple silver chain, but with an intricate silver ring hanging off the end, with two jewels in either end as they attached to v-shape piece, but the most beautiful part was the grey fresh water pearl on the end. I was stunned that Finnick would give this to me, it must have meant so much to him.

"This must be something important to you though, your Mother's-"

"Yes but, you're important to me as well," it was his turn to interrupt me, "Dad gave it to me so I would know she was there, I'm giving it to you so you know _I'm_ there – doing all I can to get you out alive."

It was strange how I was trying to hold back tears of happiness on a day like this, but Finnick's words made me feel special, made me feel so loved.

"But you won't be there with me, there's nothing you can do to stop me getting killed in the arena." I muttered, squeezing the necklace tight in my hand as I looked up into the now familiar eyes.

"I can try." Was all he said, before he took my newly acquired token from my hand and clasped it around my neck.

The promise I was going to ask of him came back in to my mind and I took a deep breath.

"Promise me something," I took his hand in mine, making sure I had his attention, "don't break up with Annie until after the games. If I win, do it. I don't, promise me you'll stay with her and try to love her."

"But I don't want to." He looked distraught, determined to go against what I said.

"But I do," I stared at him, my eyes searching his for something; I didn't know what but _something_, "I want you to be happy."

"I'll only be happy with you."

I was lost for words, he was doing it again, confusing me. But for some reason, I don't know what it was, I believed him. I believed that someone like him, Finnick Odair, could actually want to be with someone like me, someone so damaged and imperfect as me. And then I realised, everything he had said washed over me in seconds and I realised that he did. He liked me. He liked me because I was-

"Flaws. That's what you're thinking about right? I want to be with you because of those flaws Mari, because you embrace them, even if you don't think you do and you trusted me with your story and you understood I didn't want your pity when I told you mine. You're everything I want. You're perfect because you aren't perfect."

"Wait until after the games," I stated, the threat of tears back again, "Promise me. Promise me and I'll promise you that if I get out alive we can be together."

"On the count of three?" he questioned lightly and I chuckled bitterly but nodded, "One, two, three…"

_"I promise."_

XX

Solveig and Coy's stylist boarded the hovercraft with us and I nodded at Ivy as she sat down too. Once we were in the air, a woman walked around with a load of large syringes, putting them in people's arms as she went down the craft. When she got to me, I held out my right arm and hissed as she pierced my skin, injecting me with what I then realised was my tracker. My mind was filled with images from the moments before I stepped onto the craft as my fingers fiddled with the pearl necklace that was clasped around my neck. I mentally slapped myself, I needed to stop thinking about him and focus on the games, as much as that made me nervous and terrified.

We were led to a small, dull grey room when the craft landed, with a bench on one end and the pedestal I would stand on to go into the arena on the other. Solveig did up my jacket, checked my laces were done up properly and fixed my hair slightly before placing her hands on my shoulders and giving me a reassuring smile.

"You can do this Mari, I know you can, the team knows you can and I think you know you can too, deep down."

I shook my head, she was talking nonsense, "Thank you for everything Solveig." I breathed, clenching and unclenching my fists out of anxiousness.

"It's my pleasure to be the stylist of such an outstanding young girl. I'll see you once the games are over," I opened my mouth to protest, but before I could make a sound she stopped me, "I will Mari, I believe in you, you should believe in yourself."

And with that, she hugged me tightly, gave me one last look over and gestured for me to step onto the pedestal.

"Thank you for everything."

I repeated as the clear walls surrounded me and I began to panic more than ever. This was it, I was going into the Hunger Games, I was about to fight for my life against twenty-three other kids that were my age or younger. As the pedestal began to rise, I tried to keep my breathing steady, _in_ and _out_, _in_ and _out_, _in_ and _out_. The air hit me hard and I blinked, adjusting my eyes to the light and taking in m surroundings as the other tributes rose up. There were mountains to the North, which was where Ivy and I decided to head and one of the mountains held a waterfall, which flowed into a river, making a large pool at the East end of it and the West disappeared into the forest, which stretched around the rest of the arena. There was also a high grass area – it looked like it would go to about my chest – to the South, just before the forest. I caught Ivy's eye as she was the last pedestal to rise and we nodded at each other, then looked at the minute countdown at the Cornucopia's top.

My mind began to wander again as I tried to get myself ready, thinking of what I was fighting for. For my siblings, for myself, but the thing – more like person – that popped up the most, was Finnick. And I began to realise exactly what feelings I had developed for him over the week we knew each other, over the late night conversations, the situation with the nightmares and the necklace.

In the blink of an eye, everything can change. The people around you, where you live, the amount you know about something. Sometimes it's for the better, sometimes it's for the worse. When it happened to me it was definitely for the worse. What could be good about being thrown into an arena to try and kill twenty three other kids?

They say things happen for a reason. The people that go in, go in for a reason; the people that don't, don't go in for a reason; the people that win, win for a reason. Maybe he was my reason. Because if Annie hadn't have been reaped, I wouldn't have met him, I wouldn't have fallen so deeply, unknowingly, hopelessly, in love with him. But there was just one problem.

This was the 70th Annual Hunger Games... And I probably wasn't going to make it out alive.


	10. Chapter 9

_"3…"_

Bend knees.

_"2…"_

Lean forward.

_"1."_

Run.

The first backpack I saw was the one I grabbed, slinging it over my shoulder and continuing to sprint towards the mayhem. I could see Hazen grab a sword and within two seconds he had impaled the girl from District Three with it, she was the first to go. I couldn't stop for even a millisecond longer, I had to get _something_. There was no trident, but there were spears I could use and a bow – Ivy would need that bow. I dodged a knife that flew my way, tumbling onto the ground and as I looked up, the familiar blonde head of hair came into my vision; holding a bow with a quiver on her back. I took her hand as she held it out to me, both of us beginning to sprint North to the mountains. But suddenly I felt myself fall again and as I closed my eyes for impact, I felt something, someone catch me.

The person set me on my feet again and I felt myself panic as I saw who it was. Lutz loomed over me, blood smeared on his face, hunger in his eyes; the worst kind of hunger. I closed my eyes once again, waiting for him to end me without a second thought. I knew it, I knew I wouldn't make it out but I thought I would at least get through the bloodbath. Moments passed and I cracked my eyes open, seeing him in front of me still, but he didn't look like he was going to kill me.

"MARI!"

We both turned in the direction of Ivy and I felt Lutz grab my arm, stopping me from running to her as she stood there, her bow aimed. He dragged me backwards and I decided that both of us didn't have to die.

"GO!" I screamed, "RUN!"

I tried to dig my heels into the ground but it was no use, he was too strong. Ivy let go of the arrow but it only grazed the boy from One's shoulder – he barely flinched- and did as I said and as she sprinted away, I faced the career again, this time looking him in the eye. I then gazed confusedly down to my hand as I felt a cool metal being placed in it – a spear.

"Welcome to the careers Four."

And that was it, he ran off and began to fight with the boy from Nine. Quickly, I came to my senses as I heard a scream from behind me, Livia was fighting with the girl from Seven who had a tight grip on her neck, her arm not being long enough to reach for her knife as it fell to the ground. It happened in seconds. I raised my arm like I had done time and time again in training, letting the spear fly from my hand and hit it's target – the girl from Seven's head. I killed her. I didn't even hesitate.

XX

I didn't know exactly when the bloodbath ended, but it was near enough when the boy from Nine ran into the forest with a knife in his arm. I looked around at who was left, both from One and Two, me and the girl from Eight. I should have just taken the spear and ran, why did I stay with them? I was a career now. I was a murderer. I jumped as cannons began to go off, counting eight in total. There were sixteen of us left, including Ivy and Coy. Ivy was in the mountains and Coy was somewhere, hopefully safe. Who was I kidding, he wasn't safe here. _I_ wasn't safe here. No one was.

"That leaves sixteen." Lutz called, "Get everything in the Cornucopia and we'll head out, Livia and Cyra on watch."

"Why us?" Cyra spat as we all began to pick up the left over crates and move them towards the centre of the horn.

"Because I want those two with me." I kept my head down, knowing he was talking about me and the girl from Eight.

XX

I let out a grunt as I piled one crate of food on top of another, wiping my forehead. We'd been moving stuff around non-stop for just over an hour and it was pretty much me and the boys who were doing all the work.

"Hey," I turned to see the girl from Eight carrying a box of medical supplies next to me, "I'm Caggie."

I nodded, taking the hand she held out to me once she'd put the box down, "Mari."

"Oh I know," She breathed, chuckling, making me look at her in confusion, "They call you a Goddess."

I snorted, leaning against the boxes I had just stacked, "I'm nothing like a Goddess, that's just the Capitol's nickname."

"The Capitol? You think it's just them?" I raised my eyebrows at Caggie, not understanding what she was saying, "Mari, the Capitol people came up with the name, but you secured it. You got a ten, you never missed a target in training and you're gonna get so many sponsors. Why else do you think they wanted you in this alliance?"

I looked over at the four careers; Lutz and Hazen lugging boxes and Cyra and Livia packing away weapons or going through backpacks. I thought about it, why would they want me in their alliance? I was a threat, but also a safety net. A few minutes of silence had passed when a shout brought both of our attention to Hazen as he gestured for us to follow him and Lutz. Grabbing a spear and a couple of daggers I began to walk off, noticing Caggie picked up a machete and a backpack. As we made our way into the grassy area I started to panic, what if they were only taking us off so they could make sure we were dead? But then I rationalized my thoughts, they could have done it already, they wouldn't have let us take weapons and they wouldn't be laying out the plan to us and walking side by side. Either way, I made sure they never got behind me and that I kept a firm grip on the spear I was holding. I grimaced as we trekked past the dead bodies of the girls from Six and Nine – both of whom Livia had killed. The bodies would be collected while we were away and while Cyra and Livia got water from the nearby pool on the East.

"What was that?" Hazen asked, holding his sword out as a rustling noise came from above of us.

I stepped forward, poking the leaves that clouded my vision of the branches and jumping back as a bird flew out at me. As I ducked, I looked down at the mud and noticed the imprint of at least two sets of feet going the opposite direction to us.

"Just a bird you idiot." Lutz grumbled and continued to stalk forward, but I held my spear across his chest, "What are you-"

"There are tracks there." I stated, pointing down.

"Well done Four," He smirked at me once he'd seen the footprints, "This way it is."

We trekked for about twenty minutes, following the tracks that slowly seemed to diminish as we went on, before we found any other source of life. A small cloud of smoke was beginning to float towards us and there was moisture in the air, meaning there was a source of water nearby – the perfect place for someone to camp. It disgusted me, how quickly I had sold out the people who had run this way, but I realised that if I didn't, I wouldn't be trusted by the careers and I didn't want to die yet – I needed to find Ivy or Coy.

"Wait." Hazen hissed as we hid behind a large tree, trying to get a glimpse of who it was, "Four, go round with Lutz, I'll take Eight."

I nodded, following the larger career around the edge of the clearing. We waited opposite Caggie and Hazen while they assessed the best way to go about things and I myself assessed them. Hazen was tall, but he was skinny, meaning there wasn't much muscle on him apart from on the arms – since he used a sword. His blonde hair was the only thing that could make him noticeable, so he'd pulled the hood of his jacket up. Lutz however was stockier than his District Two counterpart, he looked like he would be able to fight someone unarmed and still win, but he wasn't really much but good looking, his jawbone being sharper than his reflexes. I had to give him credit for being able to wield a scythe – though his new weapon of choice was a machete.

"Come on." He whispered and I came to my senses, a feeling of dread washing over me as we tip-toed towards the two sitting over a small fire.

"Well, well, well." Hazen boomed, making the tributes look up, terrified, "You should really conceal your tracks better."

My mouth was dry, was this it? They were going to tease them and then ruthlessly murder them. I looked the two over as Hazen and Lutz kept talking. Both tributes from Eleven, the girl was skinny and gaunt, the boy well-built but young. I caught his eye as he turned frantically, looking for a way to escape and I could physically see him give up; his eyes becoming hollow. I closed my eyes, willing the tears not to fall and wiped my face discreetly and fast before standing upright and staring at Caggie. She was fixated on the scene before her, eyes wide and filled with terror.

And then it happened. Two cannons rang as both tributes slumped to the floor, blood rushing and eyes frozen open. I willed myself to move, but my feet were determined to stay there, so I would look at the innocent children who were just murdered in front of me. And what did I do? Nothing. _What could I have done? _

"It's almost dark. We should be heading back." I forced myself to nod at the boy from One's words, my heart telling me to run, my mind telling me I couldn't make it on my own.

In the end I sighed, adjusting my grip on the spear and taking one last look at the tributes form Eleven before disappearing into the forest.

XX

I watched as the Capitol symbol shined in the sky and the anthem played. Once we'd gotten back to the Cornucopia, we had a drink and some dried food before setting up for the night. Conversations were simple, mostly planning for the days ahead but sometimes there were little _'everyone good?'_ or _'you okay with what you got there?' _moments that went as quick as they came and before you knew it we were watching the faces of the dead. District Three girl, District Five boy, both from Six, District Seven girl, District Eight boy, the girl from Nine and Ten and both from Eleven. I breathed a sigh of relief when I confirmed that neither Ivy or Coy were dead, I had to find at least one of them before the games were over for me.

"I'm going to sleep, Livia, Eight and Four take watch and we'll switch in a few hours." Hazen ordered and we all complied, I wasn't going to argue.

Caggie and I sat together, a spear in my hand and a machete in hers and Livia was on the other side of the horn. I hated the silence, but I would have hated the petty attempts at talking even more so I put up with it, counting the blades of grass in front of me or watching the water flow from the upmost North mountain. As a light breeze blew, I felt something lightly pat against my chest and moved to zip up my jacket, thinking it was the collar but stopped when I realised what it actually was. I rolled the pearl over in my hand and closed my eyes, thinking about what Finnick said. What was he thinking right then? About my decision to stay with the careers?

XX

**_What was she doing? What the_** hell**_ was she doing? I'd agreed to the girl from Twelve but the Careers? Why would she think that was a good idea? I was going out of my mind, the first day in the games and she was already making me near to a breakdown. I jumped as a hand touched my shoulder, pulling my own away from my face and looking up at who it was._**

**_"Haymitch." I sighed, gesturing for him to sit with me, even though I knew he would have anyway._**

**_"She's okay at least. Yeah the careers may not have been the best choice, but she was scared. You know what it feels like Odair; don't be hypocritical." At my questioning look he continued, "I may drink a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm not observant. Plus my asked a few weird questions about mentor - tribute relationships."_**

**_Nodding, I faced one of the many screens again, the one focused on the Cornucopia. She was sitting with the girl from Eight – Caggie I think her name was – on watch. I closed my eyes as she closed her own and held the pearl necklace in her hand, foolishly hoping that somehow she would be able to know what I was thinking. I should have told her before she got on the hovercraft. I should have told her how I fell for her, how I fell so stupidly and relentlessly in love with her. But I was too much of a coward. I told her I would do anything to get her out of there but even _**I **_knew that I couldn't make sure she won the games. I just tried to give her hope; give myself hope. Hope that we could be together in the end._**


	11. Chapter 10

The morning came too quickly after we swapped with Lutz, Hazen and Cyra on watch and the two hours it took for me to actually fall asleep. I had found myself looking for something to cuddle into, so I took off my jacket and wrapped my arms around it; the empty feeling eating me up inside. I raked my hands through my hair, redoing the braids before joining everyone else to have breakfast. We ate in silence, the burning of the portable stove the only thing that was making any noise other than the occasional clinking of plates.

"Right," Lutz roared as he stood up and stretched, "Four, Eight, Hazen – you stay here, we're going off hunting."

I felt my breakfast stir in my stomach as he said that. _Hunting_. They called it _hunting_. I busied myself with the clearing up and let them go before I showed my face again. Caggie smiled at me from her seat on West side of the Cornucopia. I returned it and sat down next to her, a sigh escaping my lips.

"Would it be ignorant of me to say I'm bored?" I chuckled lightly at her admission and nodded.

"Probably," I lowered my voice, "But they don't trust us yet."

"You mean they don't trust me, you lead them yesterday and you saved Livia in the bloodbath," At my pained look she seemed alarmed, "I'm not having a go at you, you're trying to survive. If I'd had seen the tracks I probably would have done the same thing."

I gave her a grateful look, suddenly feeling the boredom myself. We were just sitting, so I decided to make myself useful. Grabbing all the dirty plates from the pile we had made, I told them I was going to go and wash everything up in the pool. Caggie jumped at the chance to join me and I picked up a couple daggers to take just in case, her taking her machete once more. We made our way over, finding a spot on the bank to sit and started to clean the plates and mugs that Caggie had brought over. For the first time in the arena, the silence was a comfortable one and I felt kind of relaxed as we got a system going. I washed and she used a rag to dry everything and piled it up again. However it didn't stay like that for long. My head snapped up as the rustling of leaves surrounded us. The girl beside me noticed too and nudged me with her elbow, moving to grasp her weapon and I did the same. Nothing else happen for a few minutes, but I wasn't going to let my guard down just yet. And it was lucky I didn't.

A body flung itself down from a tree, knocking both Caggie and I down to the floor, except the floor wasn't the floor. I feel down and suddenly felt myself become submerged in the pool of water we'd been sitting beside and having not taken a breath before breaking the surface, I struggled to swim upwards, gasping when I finally did so. Scrambling to the bank, I climbed out of the water and managed to catch the direction the person who had attacked us was running off in – Caggie struggling in her arms. I picked up the remaining dagger; the other having fallen in the water with me; before sprinting off after them.

When I got through the first layer of trees I found them, Caggie putting up a surprisingly good fight as the person I now recognised as the girl from Five attempted to get a hold of her machete – a firm grip on her neck. I assessed the situation for a moment, figuring out the best way to attack without hurting Caggie more as I did so, before I decided to just go for it. I jumped at them from behind, my hand grasping the fabric of the girl from Five's shirt and pulling her down with me to the ground. We wrestled in the leaves as I tried to wear her out, the look in her eyes scaring me. They held a sense of achievement, but as I gained on her they changed - she was terrified. Though her fight didn't let up and neither did mine, both of us scared that these were our last few minutes.

Just as I reached for the dagger attached to my belt, she increased her force and rolled me over, pinning me down and my muscles clenched and unclenched as she closed in on me. It was like what happened on the train, only I felt like my throat was getting smaller and I couldn't breathe. Suddenly, the weight was ripped off me and I struggled to catch my breath again. Standing once more, I focused in on Caggie holding our struggling offender in a headlock and without thinking, something I had done numerous times over the last day, I charged towards them with the dagger in hand and stabbed her right in the stomach.

Pulling back I let her fall to the ground, breathing heavily as I realised what I had done. She was the second person I had killed in the arena and I shut down completely. The cannon went off, shocking me even more as I collapsed against the nearest tree, covering my ears as Caggie tried to speak to me

XX

Eventually I managed to bring myself together and balance on Caggie as she supported me walking out the forest, clothes still wet and muddy. Livia, Cyra and Lutz were back at the Cornucopia by the time we got there and they rushed over as soon as they saw my state.

"What the hell happened?" Livia screeched and I winced at the volume.

"Girl from Five attacked us, Mari got pushed into the pool and she dragged me off but she seemed to underestimate the fact there was two of us and one of her – Mari got her in the end."

I coughed, nodding at Cyra who had brought over a blanket, "You helped Cag-gie."

I had thought about what she said earlier, she needed the careers to trust her if she was going to get anywhere in there. They were only being nice to me because I had helped them and would be able to get them sponsors – supposedly. It was only then that I realised how cold I was and that I was shivering, so I wrapped the blanket further over me and sat next to the now burning stove as Hazen cooked our lunch.

As we ate, I felt my body begin to warm up, my clothes stop clinging to my body and my hair frizz as it dried. Letting the blanket fall from my shoulders I removed both hair ties and ran my fingers through the dishevelled strands and re-braided them for the second time that day; jumping and ruining the second braid as another cannon boomed around us. I pondered who it could have been while I finished my hair, whether it was another tribute or they did something accidentally and hoping to hell that it wasn't Coy or Ivy.

Later on I found that it was the boy from District Three as his image shone in between the animated stars of the arena that evening, just before the face of the girl from Five. I slept even worse than the night before.

XX

No one died on day three, no cannons sounded and no faces appeared in the sky. We'd trekked in a different direction than before, but came up with nothing and returned to Lutz and Livia without anything to report and they had the same for us. We spoke about simple things, though it was mainly me and Caggie sitting on our own and comparing things about our Districts, the food, the traditions or even the people. We were on guard of course, the feeling of danger constantly surrounding us, especially after what had happened the day before. But on day four, we went out again, all the girls this time as the boys wanted to guard the supplies. We furthered West, seeing signs of water which meant there would be some tributes there. It took us a few hours to get anywhere near a water source, but when we did I almost began crying at the sight of who was there.

Coy and Finch – Ivy's fourteen year old District partner - both huddled up in a concaved tree, their camouflage good but not good enough because Livia and Cyra noticed them straight away. I was completely glued to my spot behind a fir and it was obvious Caggie had realised who it was that the two career girls were looking at with bloodthirsty eyes as she rested a hand on my shoulder. I made to go after the two girls as they entered the clearing but she stopped me, turning my body to face her.

"It's better if he doesn't see you. Mari, if you try to do anything they will kill you too and you don't want that." The girl from Eight hissed and I felt my heart become numb.

"I don't care if they kill me."

She shook me, "Yes you do. Because you have people to go back to, Mari, people who believe in you right now. So stay here."

I nodded rigidly, for once being intimidated by the skinny blonde girl and she stalked off to join them as they taunted the two young boys. I couldn't help but watch as their fragile bodies were dragged from their hiding place and they were forced to stand, the height of the careers meaning they were overshadowed greatly. But one thing I noticed was that Finch stood his ground, Coy positioned slightly behind him as he glared up at the people who were about to take his life. Finally I felt my feet move along the ground and I made to burst through the hedgerow and stop them, get them to kill me first; even though somewhere inside myself I knew it wouldn't matter.

I wasn't quick enough. My brain wiped all other thoughts as the silver blade of Livia's knife pierced through the fabric of Finch's shirt and into his heart and all I could see was the deep red liquid running onto the dried mud and into the small pool the other end of the river had created. And then my senses seemed to shut off all together as the small boy I had seen running around the docks when he was little and laughing with my brother as they raced each other home from school just a few months before, was pushed onto the ground and the edge of Cyra's axe sliced through his neck. I gasped as my eyes fixated on the blood pouring out and the now detached head rolling a few centimetres from the rest of his body, falling backwards.

My body began to shake, my head was spinning, my heart was pounding, lungs shrinking, throat closing in and vision became spotted. I could have stopped them, I could have made it dignified, I could have done something. His family had to see that, Kai had to see that and they all saw me see it too. Coy was so young, he didn't deserve it, he had so much of his life left to live and knowing him it would have been a successful one; but they killed him. I clutched my hands over my ears as all sorts of noises filled my hearing range, closing my eyes; rocking my body _backwards_ and _forwards_ and _backwards_ and _forwards_ and _backwards _and _forwards_. I opened my eyes to see Caggie's staring directly at me, her body crouched down to the right height since I was on the floor.

"Let's get you back to the Cornucopia. They'll be wondering where we are." She whispered lightly, an arm wrapping around my waist to help pull me off the ground.

I looked forwards only as we traced our route back and I found myself fiddling with the necklace around my neck as we went, like I was looking to it for comfort. And it was then I realised what the careers had been doing, what they were hoping to get out of our alliance. They wanted to do this to me, make me weak so they would be able to kill me easier. They only wanted me so I could help them and then they would just get rid of me after making me into a mess and I wasn't going to let them do that. We broke into the Cornucopia clearing as the Capitol anthem began to play and the faces of the two boys shone, breaking the darkness the sky held for just a moment. And I decided in that moment what I had to do – I had to make a break for it.

XX

**_"She's doing good, I'm sorry about your boy."_**

**_I looked up at the older victor, giving him a grateful nod as he adjusted his glasses and sat down with his fellow mentor a few seats away. It was people like him that made me thankful to have all the victors around me at times like these; because if you excluded One and Two, everyone was friends with each other, knowing what we'd all gone through and how hard it was to keep those kids alive in the arena. _**

**_Coy was a good boy, if he had to go, he deserved to go in a better way than he did. Oh and Mari, she was unstable anyway and seeing that must have messed with her even more – which is exactly what the careers wanted. She had to get away from them. Ivy was in the mountains with the boy from Ten, all Mari had to do was find them but I couldn't help her while she was still at the Cornucopia. Unless... Unless I told her in some sort of code._**

**_"Hey Beetee?"_**


	12. Chapter 11

I went to sleep as soon as we got back to the horn, but I woke up at least six times because all I could dream of – no, have nightmares about – was Coy and Finch's deaths. They replayed over and over in my mind and how I didn't do anything to stop it from happening. Eventually, I gave up on tossing and turning and told Cyra to go to bed and that I would take watch. I made myself a hot chocolate and sat down with only my thoughts to keep me company, which probably wasn't the best thing. My only musings were of the boy from my District and his friend getting slaughtered in front of me. Then Kai popped up, my little brother gazing at me with wide eyes simply saying, _'Coy can't come to play.'_ Over and over and over, it played in my mind and I once again found myself rocking backwards and forwards.

"I'm so sorry Coy, I'm so sorry." I whispered through the salty tears that ran down my face, wishing there was something I could do.

_Beep. Beep Beep. Beep. Beep Beep._

I looked up with a started as the automated noise sounded, scrambling off of the log I had balanced myself upon and over to the parachute that was slowly falling down as if we had all the time in the world. The small canister popped open easily and I gratefully swallowed the tablets it contained as they were made to calm you down and I felt significantly more relaxed a few minutes later and read the card attached.

_-. - - / ... .- ..-. . .-.-.- / .. ...- -.- / .. -. / - - ..- -. - .- .. -. ... / - - / .- . ... - / .- .. - ... / -... - -.- / ..-. .-. - - / - . -. .-.-.- / -. - / - - / - ... . - .-.-.- / -.-. .- .-. . . .-. ... / -. . - - .. -. -. / - - - / -.. .- -. -. . .-. - ..- ... .-.-.- / .-.. - ...- . / ..-. .. -. -. .. -.-. -.-_

I stared at the piece of paper for a minute, the dots and dashes swirling around in my head. I didn't know what it meant for a while, my brain not fully functioning that the small notions could mean something to me, but then it clicked. When Finnick and I talked, we didn't just talk about each other; we talked about Panem and the Dark Days and we spoke about spies and the way people communicated. One of the things they'd used was a code of dots and dashes that my Dad taught me because he used them on the boat to talk without the peacekeepers knowing. He remembered. My eyes roamed over the text and slowly but surely I managed to translate what it said.

_NOT SAFE. IVY IN MOUNTAINS TO NORTH WEST WITH BOY FROM TEN. GO TO THEM. CAREERS GETTING TOO DANGEROUS. LOVE FINNICK _

I felt butterflies in my stomach when I read that he had written _'Love Finnick', _my hand instinctively reaching to clasp the pearl pendant in my hand. He was trying to help me get to Ivy, huh? And he'd objected to the alliance in the first place… Well I guess anything was better than the careers. I looked across to the group of people all sleeping soundly by the mouth of the horn, before looking up at the sky and mouthing _'thank you'_. That's when I set off. I grabbed all the stuff I needed, my jacket; a couple spears and daggers, plus some extra arrows that I found; a sleeping bag and torch; some rope; food and water – enough for me and the others when I found them – and a medical kit; shoving them all in a rucksack. I checked my shoe laces and jacket were done up and pulled the bag onto my bag, creeping away from the Cornucopia. But in the time that it took me to look back, I had already made the decision to do the better thing and lead myself around the side and to the edge of the horn's mouth; where Caggie was sleeping.

I shook her shoulder lightly, whispering her name and slowly she began to stir, before jumping up when she saw my face so close to hers.

"What are you-"

"Shhhhh!" I put my hand over her mouth, checking that both One and Two were all still in their slumber, "I'm going, I've got everything I need but you should come with me. We can go together."

The girl from Eight shook her head at me, smiling sleepily, "Mari, I can't come with you. You've got to do this yourself, I can distract them."

"But you can't stay here they'll-"

This time it was her turn to cut me off, a soft look on her countenance, "I know. But you have someone to find, something to fight for when it all comes down to it. I meant what I said when we first met. They call you a Goddess for a reason, Mari. I'll give you two hours. Two hours to get as far away from the Cornucopia as you can before I wake them up and tell them you've gone, I'll make them head the complete opposite direction. Just go, do this for me. And if not for me, then for the boy, make sure he didn't die for you not to win this thing."

I thought of Coy again, his terrified face exposing his youth and his unequipped being for these games. I nodded, gaining the courage to do it on my own, to make sure Coy didn't die in vain. Jogging away, I headed straight for the first layer of trees, to conceal myself as I headed North West to find Ivy, wherever she was with the boy from Ten. I owed Caggie now, but I didn't know whether that was a debt I would ever be able to repay.

XX

I hiked the whole night, hoping to get as far away from the Cornucopia and as close to Ivy as I could before dawn broke. And when it did I stopped off in a shaded area to have a drink of water and a couple of the biscuits I had taken, setting off again as soon as I had finished. I walked warily, checking behind me every so often and kept a spear in my hand and a dagger in my belt at all times. My legs ached and my back was beginning to cramp, so I decided to find somewhere to set up camp for the night. Soon, I came to a small stream that had obviously come from the waterfall on the North most mountain and debated crossing or following it down. Spying some small rocks sticking out the top of the body of water, I decided to cross and find a tree on the other side to camp by, a need for furthering my distance from the careers. I stuck my foot out and pushed down on the first rock and when it didn't moved I stood fully on it, doing the same with the other five that went across the stream. I broke through the edge of the forest about fifteen minutes later, breathing a sigh of relief when I saw that I was at my general destination. The mountains.

Before the large mountain range, there was a promenade of rocks, more like boulders, that stood in front and I skimmed my eyes across them, wondering whether I should climb over or find a crevice I could fit everything in and camouflage myself. I decided on the latter, as I didn't know exactly what was behind the boulders and getting the rucksack over was too much for my aching limbs at that moment.

So I scavenged along the line, almost whooping when I found a place I could easily be concealed and hopped inside, sitting in the sleeping bag I had brought and getting out some more food. There was a layer of leaves covering the entrance to my hide out so it was pretty dark, but I didn't want to risk using the torch just in case. So I ate and drank a little before scooting back and letting myself fall asleep.

XX

**_I felt myself calm down when Mari fell asleep in the cave, knowing she was away from the careers made me worry a lot less because there was less chance of them making her mentally challenged. I could see it in her from the moment on the train and after she told me about her life; I knew she wasn't all that stable anyway and I didn't want her to get worse because it would make her more of a target in there. We were lucky that she was such an amazing girl because the sponsors were pouring in and I was able to send her the calming pills, along with my coded message; thanks to Beetee._**

**_"Strong," I faced Mags as she sat down next to me on the sofa, "She's strong enough."_**

**_"I know," I smiled lightly, looking back at the sleeping girl on the screen, "But sometimes that isn't good enough."_**

**_And as I looked over to all the other Victors I realised they all had strengths they were able to use in the arena, Mari's strength wasn't supplied to her. I knew why that was, she'd voiced her own opinion on the matter to me and that was why I was so set on getting her out. Snow was trying to punish her for ruining my punishment. I had to give her the chance to show her strength, like Mags gave me mine when I was in the arena._**

XX

_Beep. Beep Beep. Beep. Beep Beep._

I rubbed my eyes as I woke up and tried to figure out exactly what was making that noise and widened them when I realised exactly what it was. Scrambling to get out of the sleeping bag, I rushed out of my little cave and checked my surroundings. I spotted the parachute a few feet away and I felt my heart leap at what was attached to it. Finnick was a God, I swear. I grabbed the trident within seconds and brought it back into the cave with me, detaching the parachute and taking the note that came with into my hand. Luckily it wasn't in code this time, my sleepy mind not awake enough to translate.

_YOU KNOW I THREW MY FIRST TRIDENT IN THAT EXACT SPOT ON THE BEACH. WASN'T NEARLY AS GOOD AS YOU THOUGH. LOVE FINNICK._

I giggled slightly, shaking my head in fondness – of course it would have been better than me – and I almost forgot where I was. Almost. A squeal brought my attention back to the outside and I chanced a look through the leaves. Stifling a gasp at the scene, I picked up the trident, weighing it in my hand and stepping outside. The girl was struggling, the boy grasping her arms tightly, so she couldn't move, his back to me. I walked further towards them, readying my newly acquired weapon in my hand, before letting them know of my presence.

"Let her go Hazen." The boy span around, his grip swapping from her arms to holding his sword to her neck as they both looked at me.

"And why would I do that?" He spat and I raised my arm as he pressed the blade closer to the girl's neck.

"Because you want me, I know you do. So let Caggie go."

Smirking, he shifted, "Okay."

My eyebrows furrowed – surely it wasn't that easy? I stayed poised to fight as he loosened hold and Caggie moved slightly away from him, but I realised what was happening too late. I jumped forward, reaching my arm out as Caggie screamed, Hazen's sword slicing her throat. The cannon sounded seconds later as her body hit the floor and I regained my previous stature; anger coursing through me. He ran at me and I blocked his shot with the trident, kicking him in the stomach, pushing his sword out of his hand. As the clang of the metal hitting the floor echoed around us I stepped forward and the trident into his abdomen. Pulling away, I looked over at Caggie's body lying a few metres away and closed my eyes for a moment, I got to repay her; even if she never knew.

I rushed back to the cave and packed up my stuff. I had to find Ivy and the boy from Ten before dark or I would go crazy. Taking another of the tablets Finnick had sent me, I started walking in the direction I was told they were in, keeping my guard up at all times. The hovercraft flew overhead and I watched as the claw reached down and took up Caggie and Hazen's bodies one after the other. I stopped for a moment, wanting to clean the end of my trident in the stream and as I did so I looked at it closer than I had before. I looked at the scratches on the points and the dent in the handle and finally the initials that were engraved into the end.

_F.O_

Finnick Odair. It was Finnick's trident. _Why the hell would he give me his trident?_ I thought back to the first day of the games, before I got on the hovercraft. _Why the hell would he give me his Mother's necklace?_

"They're important to him…" I muttered to myself, still hunched over the stream as I stared at the weapon in my hand.

XX

**_"Eight left. Caesar'll be wanting interviews soon." I nodded at Chaff, for once hoping that I would be one of the mentors interviewed._**

**_The only ones left were both from One, the girl from Two, the boys from Seven, Nine and Ten, Ivy and Mari. The boy from Nine wouldn't last much longer – his arm becoming infected since he pulled the knife that was imbedded in it out – and the boy from Seven was close to the careers new path as they searched for Mari. But the others, well they really had a chance, all of them. Ivy and the boy from Ten were surviving well on their own and with Mari they would be unstoppable, even One and Two would be scared of them – but what would happen after that? Mari wouldn't want to kill Ivy and Ivy wouldn't want to kill her; I could see it when I watched them train, they were actually friends._**

**_"So what's the odds like?" Haymitch piped up, taking a sip of whatever alcohol was in his flask._**

**_The 'vaguely normal' group of Victors had gathered in Eleven's apartment and by 'vaguely normal' I meant not the careers or the morphlings. It was me, Mags, Haymitch, Chaff and Seeder, Beetee and Blight. The games were on in the background as we sorted out sponsors and chatted about people's tactics. Blight had no hope for his boy, who he had attempted to help but his advice was ignored completely and now the boy had almost run out of everything he needed. But Mags, Haymitch and I, we had strong tributes who were allies; so we had to be allies too, until the end of the games – or the end of our tribute. _**

**_"One are both 12/1, Seven's 20/1 and Nine's 30/1. Ten's 9/1, Ivy's 7/1 and Mari's…" I looked at Beetee expectantly as trailed off, looking at the small screen in front of him._**

**_"Mari's what?" I asked, confused as to why he couldn't just tell us._**

**_"Mari's 2/1."_**

**_2/1? Mari was 2/1 on the betting pool, she was most likely to win in the eyes of the Capitol? Caggie was right, Mari had people who believed in her; but a whole lot more than she thought._**


	13. Chapter 12

I wiped the sweat off my head as I jumped off a boulder. I had been walking the whole time since I washed the trident, with it still gripped in my hand. I was looking even more desperately for Ivy and the boy from Ten, because if the careers knew where Hazen went and tried looking for him and they were nearby, that wasn't going to end well. I couldn't stop thinking though, now that I was on my own I couldn't distract myself from thinking about everything that had happened. The tributes from Eleven, the girl from Seven, the girl from Five, Hazen, Caggie, Finch… Coy. They were all dead because of me, one way or another. I was the reason eight people died in this arena. I knew it was inevitable that I would have to kill someone, but I watched and didn't do anything about the rest of them and that was even worse.

Suddenly, a crashing noise made me turn around and I held my trident out in front of me.

_"I told you too be careful!"_ A feminine voice hissed. A feminine voice I recognized really well.

"Ivy?" I called lightly, spinning in all directions trying to find her, "Ivy?"

A few moments later another small crash sounded and a blonde head of hair appeared from behind a pile of rocks. Her eyes met mine and a grin spread across her face and I was sure mine mimicked hers.

"Mari!" She exclaimed, running out from her hiding place and running towards me. I met her halfway and pulled her into my arms, so glad to see she was alright. We pulled away after a few seconds and she looked me in the eyes, "Are you okay? What's happened?"

It was weird to me that she knew that something was wrong, just by looking at me. I honestly hadn't had anyone who could do that before, aside from Finnick, but with him it was different. I couldn't stop myself from crying, I fell into her arms again, sobbing into her shoulder. I felt her move me, I wasn't sure how far or where to, but I knew it was to get us out of the open.

"Mari," she said my name again, but this time softer, soothingly, "Mari what happened?"

"It's all my fault, they all died because of me…" I sobbed, looking up at her and finally noticing the other person and our surroundings, "Sorry, not the best first impression."

We were in a small cave, a couple sleeping bags and backpacks in the corner, Ivy's bow now on the floor next to us and the boy from Ten by the entrance, a comforting expression on his face. He shook his head at me, giving me a smile and I returned it, shifting so I was sitting with my back against one of the cave walls.

"Continue…" I faced Ivy again and took a deep breath, shaking my head and reaching to my backpack.

I took some more of the calming tablets and drank some water to make sure I recovered from my little breakdown before we had to set off again.

"Look, we need to get out of here. I ran from the careers and killed Hazen, they'll be looking for me now and I needed to find you to get you out the area."

"Well you found us, let's go."

XX

Ivy, the boy from Ten – who I soon found out was called Lawson – and I all packed up quickly and started walking down South through the boulders and into the forest. As we travelled I asked what they had been doing over the past few days and gave Ivy the arrows I remembered I had in my bag. Having people I could trust with me, made it so I could walk in front without having the fear I was going to be literally stabbed in the back. It didn't take long for us to travel back to the point I entered the forest from the Cornucopia, since it was daylight and we were more protected than I had as there was three of us. I wanted to see whether the careers were there, but didn't want to get too close to the edge in fear of them seeing me, so Ivy handed me her bow and started to scale the nearest tree. Lawson and I stood waiting, back to back as she climbed and I felt the awkwardness of the situation grow with each second that passed.

"Ugh!" I span around to face Ivy as she jumped back to the ground, "Only Lutz is there, no sign of the others. We should keep going."

I nodded, handing her back her bow and beginning to walk again.

The night came pretty quickly and we all tied ourselves to branches of a tree, sitting in our sleeping bags and eating the biscuits I had in my bag. As I looked down at the other two, I began to panic again, because what if what happened to Coy and Caggie happened to them too? What if I was the reason they died as well? I couldn't let that happen, I didn't want that to happen. _But this is the Hunger Games - _the little voice inside my head interrupted – _people die, it's inevitable_. But it shouldn't be like that, the Capitol wanted punishment for the Districts; but this wasn't punishment anymore… It was entertainment.

XX

The next morning Lawson woke us up early, having heard a sound coming from just North of us, so we set of as soon as we had everything back in our packs and our feet on the ground. We got to the small pool at the end of the stream by mid-afternoon and I fell back, the memories rushing through my head. The tree they had hidden in was the first thing I looked at, the braches messed up from the scrabble that had happened and the concave fully on show. I walked towards it as the sun hit the mud, a glimmering catching my eye and I fell on the floor as I searched for what it was. My fingers brushed over something silver and I took a breath before closing my hand around it and pulling it out of the ground, inspecting. It was necklace, the whole of it was silver and the pendant on the end made it obvious whose token it had been. Looking at the anchor on the end, memories flashed and I remembered all the times I had seen him wearing the necklace over the time I knew him – when he first came over for dinner; when we went to the annual memorial for the men of the boat my Father died on; the reaping.

When I felt a hand on my back I flinched, coming out of my stupor and turning to face my two allies. Ivy stood behind me, a sympathetic expression on her face.

"We should get out of here."

Just as I was about to reply, a new voice sounded through the forest and I felt my temper rise as I recognised the voice.

"Oh, you won't be going anywhere." I stood, picking up my trident as I did so and face the girl who was at the other end of the pool, "Oh come on, someone say something, this won't be nearly as fun if none of you beg. You're little friend begged, Four. Coy, was it? And his friend from Twelve, seems like he followed your ally choice."

Ivy stood to attention when she heard Finch being mentioned, obviously not knowing that they had both been killed together and she aimed her bow.

"I'm so scared! Go on then, shoot me."

The arrow flew seconds later and Cyra stood still as it went straight past her head, landing in the trunk of the tree behind her and she laughed beginning to taunt her. That was when I realised what they were doing. Lawson was slowly making his way around as Ivy distracted Cyra, but it wasn't going to last for long so I took matters into my own hands. Raising my arm, I threw my trident much like Ivy had fired her bow, so it wouldn't hit the girl from Two, but turn her attention to me.

"You're going first."

She spat as she turned to me, her grip on her axe notably tightening but I just stayed where I was, because just a few seconds later – _BOOM_ – the cannon went off.

XX

**_After Lawson killed Cyra, everyone went crazy; for the victors it was with worry but with the Capitol it was with excitement. The cameras stayed on the three for pretty much the rest of the day as they ran back North from the remaining careers who had shown up a few minutes later. Eventually they lost them but unfortunately it seemed that everyone wanted to go out and wander because the boy from Nine showed up. He tried to fight them and get past, both Mari and Lawson however losing their chance to actually do something, but Ivy had her bow strung and fired the arrow into the back of his head as he ran away. Six left. It all happened so quickly that not even I noticed that it had become the night and that everyone was going to sleep and I should probably have been doing the same._**

**_But since Mari had gone into the games I couldn't sleep again, the nightmares were back and there was no one to stop them. She was right when she said it was like she protected me from them, even if she was saying it as a joke. What made things worse was that even though I had an in-games tribute, Snow was giving me appointments every other day, sometime not even at night and I had to leave Mags to watch on her own because I was off doing something or someone that made me sick to my stomach. I could barely look in the mirror._**

**_The next morning, it was announced that since there was only six tributes left – Caesar would be holding interviews. Which meant that the mentors of the last tributes would be filling the screens of the Capitol and Districts in between the games for the day and it was going to be torture. They organized it in District order, meaning Mags and I were on second, after Cashmere and Gloss – One's mentors. I let the prep team attack me with all their equipment for the majority of the morning, appreciating their choice of a simple pair of black dress trousers and a blue silk shirt – with the top buttons undone of course – for me to wear before making my way down to the studio._**

**_"And now, the mentors of the girl who has been named a Goddess, FINNICK ODAIR AND MAGS COHEN!"_**

**_I held Mag's hand as we walked onto the stage, waving with the other at the audience and shaking Caesars hand too. Sitting down, made myself look comfortable, like I owned the place – that was how they liked me._**

**_"Now, Finnick, Mags, you're tribute Mari Gallagher… she's a special one. She's the favourite to win these games and well like I said, she's been named a Goddess. Mags, what do you think of Mari."_**

**_I waited patiently; as did Caesar; for Mags to answer, as he knew after the years and years she had been a mentor that she struggled._**

**_"She's a strong girl," The woman who was once my own mentor spoke proudly and I wondered whether she had done the same for me, "Mari has talent."_**

**_"That she does," the green haired man nodded, "She's shown she is quite capable of fighting, with more than one weapon as well. Finnick, what about you? Tell us more about Mari."_**

**_And that was the moment I was dreading because once I started I knew I wouldn't be able to stop._**

**_"For starters – and I'm sure you'll agree with me – she's the most stunning and enticing person I have ever met. It's like Mags said, Mari's strong and she has the most amazing talent with a trident that I have ever seen; she's a fighter. But it's been shown with Ivy and Caggie that Mari is trustworthy and can make someone feel safe and guarded, if she's an ally, she's an ally – no breaking of promises. Obviously you've seen from her time in the arena that she has her own obstacles and losing Coy was hard for her, but that's just a slip up of her own way of being a strong individual, Mari keeps control of her heart but sometimes she fails to and it affects her. Though she always manages to make the right decision, whether by her heart or her head and I know she can do this."_**

**_I mentally slapped myself, why the hell did I say that? That could cause so many problems. The audience were either cheering or 'aw-ing' and I faced the woman next to me for a second, getting a smile from her lips but her eyes spoke something else; they said _****'oh, Finnick, what have you done?'****_ And I didn't know. I had no idea what I had done, but I had to fix it and luckily I got the opportunity to._**

**_"Well, Mr Odair, if I didn't know any better I'd say you had feelings for this young lady!" Caesar, raised a dyed eyebrow at me and chuckled lightly, he knew what he was doing._**

**_I laughed quickly, holding my hands up, "As much as I'd love a lady like that to myself, I'm afraid I'm only her mentor!"_**

**_I wondered what Annie would be thinking. No one in the Capitol knew about our relationship, so the last comment wouldn't faze her – it was the fact I'd had to say the last comment that would. But maybe it would help, maybe she would break up with me, because if Mari didn't make it I still wouldn't want to stay with Annie; but I wouldn't want to break my promise. I chided myself, Mari would make it out of the arena – I promised her and I promised myself. I kept my promises._**


	14. Chapter 13

"Maybe," I hesitated, did I really want to say this? Yes, I had to, it was too dangerous now, "Maybe… We should split up. I don't want to have to… If it comes down to it."

I trailed off, I didn't want to let the words roll off my tongue, let myself say out loud that I might have to kill them. There were six of us left and soon enough the games would be over, we could all be dead or one of us could be alive. I didn't want to be the reason Ivy and Lawson died and I won. I didn't want to be the reason they died at all. We were sat around a small, enclosed fire under the cover of thick trees, huddled together.

"We'll talk about it in the morning," Lawson replied softly, "You two sleep, I'll take first watch."

Ivy and I both smiled at him gratefully, picking up our sleeping bags and slipping into them, my trident at my side and her bow and quiver attached to her still. I tried to fall asleep, closing my eyes and moving around to make myself more comfortable but I just couldn't slip into a dream. Shuffling, I moved so I was sitting next to Lawson but still in my sleeping bag. He acknowledged my presence, but said nothing, as there was nothing to say. So we sat in silence and I watched him, my heart dropping when I saw what he couldn't stop looking at. He liked Ivy. His eyes were constantly on her form. I'd been worried about my love life, but his was much worse – he could win and have to live with the fact the person he liked died. Finnick wasn't in the arena with me, I knew he was safe; Lawson could lose Ivy before he even had her.

"You like her, don't you?" I whispered, jumping as he span around to face me.

"What are you talking about? Of course I don't Mari that's stupid!" He hissed, but I saw a flicker in his eyes, a flicker of sorrow.

"It may be stupid but it doesn't mean it isn't true." I stood my ground, wanting an answer from him.

All I got was a half-hearted glare.

"Go to sleep."

Sighing, I patted him on the shoulder and once more scooted against the tree and tried to fall into a slumber. Once I finally drifted off my dreams were full of wishes and hopes. Finnick appeared more than once, his cheeky grin feeling like it was only feet away from me. And Kai and Senna ran through, their giggles erupting from their mouths and surrounding the small vision of my home with the sound. But then the darkness came, Lawson and Ivy's bodies lying in the playing fields of the school… Coy's family weeping over the small wooden coffin the Capitol sent… my own reflection staring back at me covered in blood and dirt…

XX

_My form was covered, the red mixing with the brown but it was still obvious what it was. My clothes were ripped and my hair matted, eyes bloodshot and surrounded by dark circles. I was still in the arena; Ivy and Lawson were nowhere to be seen, I was alone. My trident was still clutched in my battered knuckles, but the clean points were now dripping with warm blood. The liquid fell from the blades in fluid motions; a pool of it had gathered in the grass below._

_Stepping lightly, I made my way through the greenery, trying to find a sign of my two allies - or anyone really. It took barely any time for me to break into the Cornucopia clearing and I gasped as I did so. Bodies scattered all over; limbless, decapitated; pale, covered in scarlet or pierced with weapons. Buckling knees, I walked further towards them trying to see the faces. Ivy and Lawson couldn't be there, surely? But they were. A few minutes later I stopped dead in my tracks as my eyes locked on the blonde hair splayed around the head of the body lying in front of me, a curly brown set of locks to the right of it. Their hands were entwined tightly and their countenances facing the other's._

_"It's all your fault, you know?" I aimed my trident, spinning to face the person who had spoken to me._

_I lowered my arm slightly as I stared at the small boy, disbelief washing over me._

_"Coy?" I questioned; moving to step towards him but he took a pace backwards, away from me._

_"It's your fault they died, Mari. You led the careers to them, but you were long gone before they got to you… But with me, you watched me die and didn't do anything!" The boy I had watched grow up shouted at me, his eyes blazing with a fire I had only ever seen once before, "You don't deserve to be alive!"_

_He was right, I didn't deserve to be here when they were all dead. _

_I suddenly found myself alone again, the bodies gone and Coy along with them. I looked down at the weapon in my hand, tightening my grip on the cool metal and raising it to my stomach, ready to use all the force I had to-_

_XX_

"MARI!" Snapping my eyes open, I sat up, coming face to face with Ivy, "You were thrashing about, are you okay?"

I blinked, assessing my surroundings. It was just a dream, it wasn't real and they weren't dead. But the dream Coy was still circling my mind; in fact, he was making my mind up for me. I had to leave before the careers came looking for me – I had to find them before they found Lawson and Ivy. So after breakfast, I brought the topic of splitting up back into conversation, not backing down this time. It was a tough battle, but eventually Ivy agreed to it and each of us packed our bags.

I didn't want to do it – leave – but I had to. We stayed silent for at least an hour, making sure we left no tracks and that all of us had enough food and other supplies. I looked at Ivy hopelessly, feeling the tears begin to burn in my eyes and I collapsed in her arms as she did in mine. It was weird that I had found my best friend in a place I was meant to hate everyone around, but I guess it was just the same as falling in love with someone when I was about to get killed. Ivy and I stayed in our embrace for a few moments, just sobbing into one another's shoulders until she whispered into my ear.

"You need to get back to him," I pulled away, shocked; wondering what she was talking about, "Come on Mari, I saw it while we were training, you need to win this."

I looked between her and a now very confused Lawson – did she not see it? How the two of them were perfect for each other, more perfect than Finn and I were. Plus, she had family to get back to as well.

"Mari, I know what you're thinking but I want you to win… _We_ want you to win."

"You're my best friend, you know that right?" I exclaimed as loudly as I could, considering we were still hiding.

"And you're mine. Never forget me, yeah?" I pulled her in for one last hug.

"Never."

"Ugh, girls…"

We both spun round to face Lawson as he stood to the side of us with a scared face – not that we took that in at first.

"What Lawson!" Ivy sighed, "Having a moment here!"

"We need to run."

I raised my eyebrow at him. He was rooted to the spot, but his hand slowly lifted up to point behind us and I followed it. The trees were shaking around us, the ground beginning to tremble also and I wracked my brain with thoughts of what could be happening. And then I realised. It happened in Four a few years ago, five to be exact. On the night my Dad's boat sunk the exact same thing happened – a tidal wave. The banks burst and part of District Four was flooded, people almost died… people almost died. That was when it hit me, the Game Makers were the only people who could have made the wave that was now flowing further and further in our direction – they were intervening. Grabbing both my allies by the arm, I sprinted through the forest as fast as I could. I tried to recall what happened in Four, how people survived… height.

We needed to climb the trees.

The water was rushing behind us and I could hear branches snapping, birds squawking, people screaming. I found the tallest and thickest tree I could and screamed for Ivy and Lawson to start scaling it as I did myself, clinging to the trident in my hand. I screamed as my foot slipped down and I lost my grip on the branch I was holding, looking over my shoulder to see that the seiche was now extremely close to us and I lifted my arm up once more, digging the blades of my trident into the bark and heaving myself up. Checking to see where the others were, I stopped for a moment, sighing with relief when I found them to be next to me; Ivy helping Lawson out as he lost his grip slightly.

"HOLD ON!" I howled at them, clinging on to the trunk of the tree; trident still wedged into the bark.

The wave hit us.

I held my breath as it submerged my body but managed to tighten my grip on the tree. The water level lowered but it was still storming past us, the current taking smaller trees and rocks with it. I took heavy breaths, shaking my head to get the water from my vision and checked on the two tributes a few feet from me and breathed a sigh of relief as I saw they were both okay. I didn't dare move any more than I already had, in fear of another wave coming towards us; my fear was right. As soon as the next surge hit I lost my grip on the tree and my trident was pulled away with me as I was washed away. I screamed as I heard a cannon and then another seconds later, quickly closing my mouth again as I lost half the store of air I was holding. Everything was spinning around me and I had to close my eyes, focusing on keeping my fingers locked tightly around the weapon they encased and attempted to shield myself from the objects that were now crashing into my body.

Managing to break the surface of the water, I found that I was near the Cornucopia, the metal shining through the waves. Ivy and Lawson were nowhere around me, but as the level of water went down I saw Lawson's form holding on to another body that was limp and undoubtedly the girl from Twelve. I gathered all the strength I had in my body and began to swim over to them; the current beginning to calm as I did so. Everything around was destroyed and all that had stayed intact was the horn itself, along with the mountains the tidal wave originated from. I reached them a few minutes later, the water now almost completely gone. I fell to the floor next to the boy from Ten as he tried chest compressions and mouth to mouth but nothing was working. Salty tears ran down my cheeks as he sat back from the unmoving body. I reached out to her, grasping her cold hand in my own.

"Come on Ivy…" I muttered, tears blurring my vision. _Boom._ The cannon sounded and sobs wracked my body, "Lawson, we have to… she shouldn't have-"

I gasped as a strangled cry emitted from behind me and a scream caught in my throat as I witnessed the scene. Livia held Lawson my the neck, her knife pointed at him, hunger in her eyes. I reached for the trident a few feet from my side but halted as soon as she moved the blade closer to him.

"You were right," He let out and I felt my heart drop, "I was never going to let myself win anyway, not if it meant she had to die. You have something to go back to."

"LAWSON!" I shrieked as the knife slit through his vein and his body fell to the floor, cannon thundering around me.

All the emotions I had bottled up over the games began to rise in my blood, anger, sadness, hate, desperation, _hunger._ I grabbed my trident and tore through the excess of mud and water to the career, engaging in a battle I needed to win. For Coy, Finch; Caggie, Lawson; Ivy and every other tribute that died in the arena – for myself. It wasn't long before we were both bruised and bloody, but then the trembling began again. Livia sprinted away to the Cornucopia and I followed, climbing up the metal sides as quickly as I could; the water still streaming down the sides making it almost impossible. However, as the wave got to the clearing, it ferocity calmed immensely and it slowly –almost too slowly – travelled around the horn, the surface never quite reaching the top. I'd lost concentration for a moment and I suddenly felt my back hit the metal and hissed in pain, letting go of the trident by accident as I did so. The girl from One and I wrestled, the dominance changing every couple of seconds until I cried out as her knife cut deep and long into my right arm. I clutched it, trying to swerve out of the knife's path and looked around for the bronze metal on top of the silver. It was only a metre or so away, but to the left and my throwing arm was useless now. I managed to push the career off of me with my legs and stood, but my strength was plummeting as I lost blood and I fell, stepping on Livia's ankle as I did so. A great snapping sound echoed and a shriek of pain came from her mouth before a guttural cry and I was flipped over onto my back. Her hands found my neck immediately and I coughed as she pulled my head to and from the water that was surrounding the Cornucopia. I tried to spot my trident once more, a small light coming on in my mind as I spotted it in almost the same place as it was before.

Livia was too preoccupied trying to suffocate me to notice my arm sneaking out to the side and I gasped heavily as she dunked my head underwater once more, closing my eyes but still moving my hand around. Her eyes were the first thing I saw as I was unsubmerged and I saw what must have been a mirror image of my own. She was desperate to win. So was I. The cool metal of my trident finally touched my skin and I shakily enclosed it in my hand, feeling odd having it on the wrong side. My vision began to spot and my brain was swirling so I lifted my arm, swinging, just as my lungs shrunk in as much as I thought they could and my eyes closed, taking me into oblivion.

XX

**_Tears streamed down my face as I watched the screen; I didn't care who was watching. After everything… It had all just ended… Everything was, well I didn't know what it was. My mind was going crazy as One began to scream, as Mags tried to get me to focus on something else and everyone gathered around us. I couldn't think straight, there was only one thing going through my mind at that exact moment in time._**

**_I had to go call Annie._**


	15. Chapter 14

Groaning, I blinked, trying to adjust my eyes to the bright lights glaring at me. I had done it. I won the Hunger Games; I was alive. A dull ache hummed through my right arm and I wiped my left hand over my face as I remembered everything that happened before I blacked out. Finally being able to comprehend my surroundings I sat up, finding myself to be in a hospital room and dressed in a very breezy hospital gown, to my annoyance. My arm was strapped up and a drip was attached to my hand, but nothing else seemed too bad. It was only then I realised there were three people in the room, all staring at me and not saying a word.

"Hello." I rasped, attempting to smile, but it faltered almost immediately.

"You brave, amazing; poor, girl." Solveig shook her head, making her way over to my bedside and running a hand through my hair.

I looked at the other two, Iunia and Mags and they both greeted me quietly, obviously not wanting to stress me out since I'd just woken up.

"You lost a lot of blood," my stylist muttered, "it took a while for the doctors to help you get back to the normal flow rate, but everything should be okay now, just try not to exert yourself."

I nodded slowly, confused. I understood why all three women were there and I appreciated the gesture greatly; but why wasn't Finnick?

"Where's Finnick?" I questioned, looking around at all of their worried faces, "Where is he?"

I grew increasingly worried as none of them said anything. Had he changed his mind about me and chosen not to ever speak to me again? Was he with one of his 'clients'?

"He was sedated because he got hysterical when you won and when he woke up he was straight on the phone to Annie," I felt my heart soar at that, he had kept his promise, "But we haven't seen him since then. He's been gone six hours."

I nodded. He'd kept his promise, he waited until I won but if he didn't come back, did that mean he didn't want to be with me either? Had he changed his mind about me? I didn't really have time to think about it before the room was filled with the bright colours and loud sounds of my prep team and I was being checked over by doctors that followed. The magic they had done on my arm was astounding, the wound almost completely healed and I was clean and healthy on the inside. But then they left again and Solveig was the only one in the room with me and my doubts were all I could focus on. My stylist didn't speak – she was probably the only Capitol person who understood you didn't have to yabber on all the time – all she did was pull out the dress I was wearing for my interview. It was beautiful, absolutely beautiful. Bright yellow in colour, the skirt went down to my knees at the front but flowed into a trail at the back with a round neck and cap sleeves. I stepped out of the bed, the gap at the back of my hospital gown letting a breeze pass over me and I shivered.

Solveig helped me into the black heeled strappy boots and then tugged the dress over my body. I sat patiently as she ushered my prep team back into the room and they attacked my face. In the end I had a natural face of make-up and my hair was braided around my head with daisies clipped in as well. I looked myself in the mirror and took a deep breath. I was completely different to when I went into the games, thinner, bruised, broken. As I watched my reflection, I couldn't help but see everyone rushing around behind me and hope to see that bronze head of hair I had missed so much.

"Any sign of him?" I broke through everyone's conversations as my voice cracked.

"No…" Albidella gulped, "But I'm sure he'll be here soon Mari, he wouldn't miss this."

"What if he _had_ to?" I questioned, the worry haunting me once more.

The faces of everyone else in the room turned to ones of shock and then sympathy. Caldesia trotted over to me and placed a hand on my shoulder, our eyes meeting our reflections.

"Let's get you over to the studio, it won't take long and we can see if he's waiting for us there."

I nodded, letting them guide me through the hallways and doors, not taking anything in. There were people congratulating me on every corner, I could hear the audience getting louder and louder and I felt my breathing become shorter and shorter. Afraid. I was afraid again, but I wasn't in any danger anymore, was I? The games were over and I was safe. Or that's what they wanted me to think.

It was almost time for me to go on stage and there was still no sign of Finnick. Caesar was chatting up the Capitol citizens in the audience and I was preparing myself to watch the horrors all over again. And in a matter of seconds I found myself being pushed on stage, forcing a smile on my lips. The Capitol people were on their feet, clapping and cheering and in all honesty – making fools of themselves. Immediately I spotted Mags, Solveig and Iunia in the audience, along with the mentors of the fallen tributes of the games – but still no Finnick.

"Mari," Caesar sighed once the audience had stopped screaming and I had sat down, "Mari Gallagher, our very own Goddess. How glad we are that you are here."

I fiddled with my fingers, letting a blush creep up my cheeks as I smiled at the interviewer, "Thank you Caesar; I'm pretty glad myself."

A wave of chuckles clouded over the room and I joined in – it was true after all. Caesar continued to ask me about my health and a brief overview of the games and it took all I had to not burst into tears. The realisation had finally set in and I was a mess on the inside. And as if the world wanted me to go crazy, as Caesar made a segway into the highlights of the games, I noticed a figure sitting down next to Mags.

Bronze hair, down in light curls, a silk black button up and white dress pants with braces. Finnick. His eyes locking with mine he smiled sheepishly but I just kept the cold expression on my face, how dare he? He had nothing going on, so why the hell was he so late? And he smiled? Was what that going to fix? Bur he had still showed up, if he didn't care, he wouldn't have showed up. Oh who was I kidding – he had to show up, it was his job to.

I tried to focus on something other than him, but it was pretty hard because the only other thing I could do was pay attention to the video that was now rolling. I made the mistake of choosing the video. My eyes widened in horror or welled up in sadness as I watched myself pierce Hazen's skin with the trident, tell Lutz where the people from Eleven were, laugh with Caggie and reunite with Ivy. And then it got to the last day. Everything happened so fast and suddenly I was looking at myself standing between the bodies of my two allies, my friends. I saw something in my eyes as they zoomed in on my face; something I never thought I would ever see.

A need to kill.

XX

I had never seen him before, up close. President Snow. The rumours were true, he smelt undeniably of roses but with a very subtle metallic undertone. Blood. He greeted me kindly - well it seemed like he was trying to be kind – before having a short conversation with Caesar as he picked up the crown that was destined for my head. I stayed silent as the proceedings went on, my breath subconsciously catching in my throat. I noticed his gaze altered path after he placed the golden crown on my head, down to the pearl around my neck. I was so used to it being there that I had forgotten I was wearing it.

"What a lovely necklace." Chills ran down my spine as his voice echoed between us.

"Thank you."

"Who gave it to you?" The smug little… I knew he knew. I could tell by the smirk he was trying to hide.

"Finnick did, it's from our District and he thought I would like it."

"I'll assume he was right. Congratulations Miss Gallagher."

I nodded curtly, just wanting to get it over and done with. Luckily, Snow seemed to as well and left, waving to everyone who had been watching and leaving me to be ushered away. _His_ eyes were the first thing I saw and I immediately felt my stomach flip and butterflies flutter around in it, but I didn't want them to. I wanted to want to go over and rip his head off for not being there, showing up late, but I couldn't. So I just walked straight past him.

I ignored his attempts at talking to me and ripping myself from his grasp when he reached out for me. Through the twists and turns we made it to the car that was going to take us to the tribute centre; he sat next to me and tried to explain himself but I wouldn't- couldn't let him. I wasn't ready for him to admit he didn't want me anymore… The ride was tense, and the silence was so thick even a machete couldn't cut through it. As soon as we pulled up, I rushed out of the car, shielding myself from the people waiting outside and bolting through the lobby of the tribute centre and into the lift without the others. I pressed the button repeatedly, my breath now coming in short gasps and tears falling freely, the small space wasn't helping either. I suddenly found myself claustrophobic, although I had never been throughout the rest of my life.

"Mari!" He called once more as the other lift opened two seconds after mine.

I was stunned. The apartment was covered in forget-me-nots and hibiscuses, yellow tulips and bronze chrysanthemums – my favourite flower. Two mugs of steaming hot chocolate sat on the windowsill - they were obviously made by an avox recently – which was lined with emerald green pillows. Taking a deep breath, I turned to face him.

"This was why you were late." I stated. I couldn't believe him, he had gone through so much effort and I was angry at him, "I can't believe I was so rude."

"You didn't know," Finnick stepped forward and took my hands in his, "You just thought I was late for no reason, you didn't know this was here."

"Thank you." I blurted, and I really meant it. I looked around at it all once more, before looking down at myself, "Do you mind if I change quickly?"

"Go ahead."

I started walking away, but span around when halfway down the corridor and ran back into the living area, pressing a chaste kiss to Finnick's cheek before carrying on making my way to my room. Aware that he was waiting and the hot chocolate would be getting cold, I quickly pulled my hair out of its intricate styles and shoved the gown on the floor, pulling on a pair of black oxfords instead of the heels and a red baggy playsuit.

Once I rounded the corner into the living room once more, I suddenly got nervous. The glimmering smile that was pointed my way may have had something to do with it. I took it a step at a time, my feet moving faster than my head hoped they would and soon enough I was right in front of him, taking my mug from his hands and sitting down.

And it was like the games hadn't happened yet.

XX

"Come on!" I laughed, straightening myself, "Tell me why you did this."

Finnick and I had spent hours sitting on the windowsill, just talking about nothing, like how I was excited to go home, to see my family and about ourselves again, our pasts and our hopes for our futures. But the reason why he covered the room in flowers and lined the windowsill with pillows was still important to me and at that moment he was refusing to tell me.

"It's not important," he sighed and I gave him a pointed look, finally getting him to relent, "Fine. I did this because you deserve it and you deserve to know…"

"What?" I asked as he trailed off, tilting my head as he had hung his.

"The flowers, they all mean something, that's why I took so long picking them out. The bronze chrysanthemums, I remembered they were your favourite flower, um," He walked over to one, fiddling with the petals, "They mean excitement; you're excited to go home and be with your family and I'm excited to have you living across from me in Victor's Village. And the hibiscuses," he picked one up, handing it and the other flower to me, "They mean delicate beauty, which is what you are."

I felt a blush rise on my cheeks as he grazed his hand across them, our eyes locking for a few seconds before he tore away quickly, reaching for a forget-me-not.

"And these mean, remember me forever, which I hope you'll do… because I will never forget you. But the yellow tulips…" he was back in front of me, holding out the last two flowers and taking my hand as I took them, "they mean hopelessly in love. Which is what I am with you."

I let out the breath I had been subconsciously holding as a light chuckle, grinning from ear to ear. It was only then that I realised our lips were just centimetres apart and I leant forward, pressing mine to his. It wasn't long, a mere few seconds, but it was sweet and soft and magical.

"I love you too."


End file.
